My Immediate Reactions After Watching Netflix’s ‘Too Hot to Handle’ Series

One thing y’all know about me is that I’m a sucker for a good reality TV show, and the trashier the better. It’s a guilty pleasure, I’m not even guilty about. Upon seeing the trailer for Netflix’s latest foray into the dating reality TV game, Too Hot to Handle, it immediately looked bad — but in a way that I definitely needed to watch. And so I did. Oh boy, did I. And, um, it was A LOT. But instead of recapping what y’all missed, I thought I’d give my unfiltered and unapologetically honest first impressions and opinions of this series. Because, hey, it’s what I do and what I like.

First off, here’s the official trailer of the new show, from the streaming service that brought you Love is Blind.

So, keep reading for a list of all my random musings and thoughts I had while watching this trashy dating show starring beautiful people, places, and accents. I watched it so you don’t have to, and here’s what happened.

  1. Slow-mo beach/pool shots of beautiful people in swimsuits, OK, this is just like Love Island.
  2. They found “the hottest, horniest, commit-phobic swipesters,” like this is a real quote from the narrator.
  3. The resort is essentially run by a Siri or Alexa-type called Lana. Lana quietly and secretly gathers intel on the guests without their knowledge, how creepy.
  4. Essex girl Chloe is like every girl I’ve ever seen in all six seasons of Love Island.
  5. The are all like 20 years old; babies! Basically, there’s an air of immaturity around the lot.
  6. Sharron openly admitted that he’s most proud of his manhood, which, um, is the size of an air freshener. Which like, ew, we didn’t want to know that. (Hey, it’s been four minutes! Geez!)
  7. I can already tell Haley is going to be annoying: She has a tattoo in another language that she doesn’t know what it means and can’t stop doing her sorority chant. Just please stop.
  8. Within 5 minutes, I already can tell it is a pure dumpster fire. Like it’s so bad, but I just can’t look away.
  9. OK but seriously, Love Island and the entire Bachelor franchise both look classier than this. Which is saying a lot because people are making out and hooking up in like every episode.
  10. Did Harry just call the girls quesadillas? Like the food? Um. And then naughty possums? Creep alert.
  11. Most of them are models and influencers, of course. One dude (the Jesus lookalike) was even on America’s Next Top Model once upon a time, like obviously none of them are here for the right reasons.
  12. It’s just so ridiculous, but I just can’t look away.
  13. David walks into bars, whips his top off, and that works for him? I’d give him serious side-eye, like what the heck, that’s so unsanitary.
  14. OK Haley doesn’t know were Australia is. Like, I just. And yet, she’s in college??
  15. This show is rapidly decreasing my interest in dating as it continues to prove that men are The Worst and just trash even more. This song just gets me right now.
  16. One thing that really, really bugs me is that the lower thirds are inconsistent. It bothers me. For the US contestants, it says the state and USA, but international kids get their city and country code. For example, “Colorado, USA” or “New Jersey, USA” are not in the same style as “Essex, UK” or “Cork, Ireland.” Like, Colorado and New Jersey are states, and Essex and Cork are cities not states.
  17. There’s no way “Kelz” is his given name. Come on, please gimme a backstory and the real information.
  18. Harry is awful and not even the least bit cute. Like, how is he a hot commodity? Surely, it’s just the accent??
  19. This show is over the top and trash, but I can’t stop watching. OK, I’m in it and invested completely, just like the streaming service’s The Circle.
  20. Even the bedroom decor looks like it was inspired by Love Island meets the beachy vibes and palapas of Bachelor in Paradise.
  21. I cannot stand Francesca and Haley. These two girls are fake fake fake and snooty bullies and I do not like watching them on my TV screen.
  22. Real question: Considering this is an international show, how would these potential intercontinental relationships work on the outside? Like, I need follow-ups.
  23. Seriously, point deductions already? Can’t you keep it in your pants? You just met and there’s a cash prize on the line.
  24. How did the casting team find these people? They are all the absolute worst.
  25. Can’t touch, can’t kiss? Huh, seems like good practice for quarantine. Welcome to our new world!
  26. It’s truly mind-boggling, like, I just cannot.
  27. Rhonda’s nails are like talons. How is that comfortable?
  28. I swear, David’s only move seems to be applying sunscreen to girls. Like, no, please don’t touch me, we just met.
  29. The boys are flirting with Lana, who is a computer. Like, quite childish?
  30. Matthew and David don’t know a single man that’s gone a month without sexual practices? Um, welcome to quarantine life as singles, hun. LOL.
  31. Chloe is funny and my instant favorite. “Think of your nan” is my new favorite quote from one of these shows. Hahahaha.
  32. Like how is this hard? Girls, just avoid the temptation: don’t shave your legs, don’t put on makeup, cover up your bikinis. You have all the tools, use it. When there’s a giant sum of money on the line, wouldn’t it be worth it?
  33. This lot cannot even go two 12 minutes without breaking the rules. Like seriously?
  34. With each kiss worth $3,000 each, surely they are going to wind up with like $50 each??
  35. Ok, I keep forgetting that Nicole is there. Oof, girl does nothing. #freeholiday #unproblematic
  36. Ick, Harry is the worst. Why is he lying and pinning it all on Francesca. Boy, you’re canceled.
  37. Haley and Francesca must not be worried about money or financial obligations if they decide to break the rules out of revenge to intentionally drag the pot down without a care in the world. Like how selfish and immature are you?
  38. I’m watching these humans tie each other up. Oy, what is TV anymore?
  39. Sharron was so happy the truth came out that he and Rhonda didn’t break the rules that he says he “feels like OJ.” Um yea, I don’t know if I’d go down that route, yikes.
  40. LOLOL, Bryce joining the crew as a late arrival with no knowledge, then finding out immediately from the rest of the participants, oh it’s a priceless look.
  41. Lana reading out an itemized bill of infractions to the group is so savage.
  42. Poor Chloe, she keeps wasting money on kisses with boys whom she doesn’t fancy. Poor girl.
  43. Boys are learning to be vulnerable by covering each other in mud? Ummmm ok? Oh and then running across the garden with wooden spears? A weird version of Braveheart or something that I didn’t expect.
  44. Why is Bryce sleeping on the floor? Like, hun, you could share a bed with a friend, make a pillow wall, sleep on the couch in the living room or the outdoor bed. Why the floor?
  45. Banter! Banter! Banter! I like a bit of banter myself (it’s the Anglophile in me) but like no one has it? They just keep saying that’s what they like???
  46. Ooh poor David, he is so sunburnt. Yikes, that’s got to majorly hurt.
  47. Like Harry and Francesca, are you the least bit remorseful about costing the group $20,000? A bit selfish, huh?
  48. The girls take part in an empowerment workshop. Great, love it, we stan women being strong and independent. But, doing so by um taking a mirror up to their *ahem* yoni and then painting an artistic portrait of it? Yea, it’s a lot. Not even Love Island has gone there!
  49. Wait, Rhonda has a son? And she waited until the penultimate episode to reveal it to anyone? Like, wouldn’t you mention that in your voiceover? To your boyfriend? Someone, anyone?
  50. Oh, so y’all are putting faith in the couple who’s lost more than $30,000 to not touch at all for a whole night in the private suite. Oy. But seriously, you better stay six feet apart. Hey, it’s good quarantine practice.
  51. I get for suspense they wanted it to seem like one couple or whatnot would get the final prize, but it was obvious based on how the whole show was set up that everyone would get a piece of the fund. And Francesca’s smug face when it was just her and her beau standing, ugh. So selfish and snooty. Nope. Then, her face when Sharron was next to stand up and then, everyone else? Like, huh, karma hun, that’s what you get for being so mean-spirited and arrogant.
  52. This was filmed a year ago. How many of them are still together? (Or at least attempted to last outside the resort.) Come on, Netflix, gimme the tea and a reunion like now.

Wow, that was truly trash and sleazy. But like, wow, it’s addictive.

What’s all the fuss about? Reviewing the Kylie Lip Kit.

So, for almost a year, the beauty and pop culture sphere (which I frequently follow, almost religiously) have been abuzz with news of the mystical Kylie Jenner Lip Kit, how to get it, how it’s amazing– and at last, I was able to purchase one of these now-famous kits, and so, I thought I’d review my first experiences with the kit.

Off the bat, getting my Kylie Lip Kit in the mail, I felt instantly cooler, like all the teens of the world would definitely approve of my newfound coolness.

Color: So, after careful research, I purchased the Koko K lip kit (which comes with a lipliner and matte lipstick). I chose Koko (named for Khloe Kardashian, Kylie’s half-sister) because the nude-pink color would look best on fair/pale skin (aka me).

It’s here! It arrived!

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Within the well-known design of the KLK box, I opened it up to find my lipstick (looking more like a lip gloss) and matching lip liner.

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The application:

Time to try it out!

As Kylie indicated on the box, “for the best result, fill in your lips with the lip liner then top with one coat of Matte Liquid Lipstick.”

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Lips filled in with Koko K liner

The liner is barely visible and appears to lose its sharpness after just one use. So, what happens when it runs low? Is there a mechanism to sharpen it? Or do you just have to buy more?

I go to apply the lipstick, as I open it, I notice how good it smells. It smells like a fruity Lip Smacker (makes me miss my childhood!) and goes on easily and really fast.

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At first, the lipstick is really glossy.

But very quickly, the lipstick becomes more matte-looking and dries just as fast. Woah. Immediately, I really like the color, it’s a cute nude-pink color that pops a bit against my skin, more than a completely nude color would, which I like.

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After some ten minutes, I notice how it doesn’t seem to be coming off at all– let’s see how it holds up when I test how well it lasts going about my regular day.

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Ta Da!

As I looked in the mirror, I noticed how it looks good when my mouth is closed, but not so much when you open your mouth or smile (that’s when you can see cracks). I mean, I don’t think Kylie ever smiles wearing her KLK, so I guess that makes sense…But, it still smells good while I’m wearing it, so there’s that.

And to all my fellow pale girls: Koko K is the perfect shade for my super fair skin tone. (Finally! A shade for us ghostly pale people that looks perfect!

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BEFORE

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AFTER

Wearing it all day:

Side effect of wearing a Kylie Lip Kit: you can’t stop taking selfies, or maybe that’s because I feel so much cooler now (like teens would approve of me now)…

Day 1 wearing the KLK, after eating my salad for lunch, the lipstick almost all came off, but the lipliner remained. Hm, interesting. Everyone on social media has raved about its lasting effects… well, clearly Kylie and her fans that wear her lipsticks, don’t eat food, because it did not hold up at all to me just eating a salad. Point one for the negative column, Kylie. Great message, Kylie: if you don’t eat, your Kylie Lip Kit will last all day! You just have to sacrifice your lipstick for satisfying your hunger, right?!? Nope, sorry Kylie and her loyal followers– that’s not a good thing. (Sorry to burst any bubbles…) Well, let me explain: after eating lunch, almost all of the color is gone, yet a faint stickiness o from the lipstick remains on my lips.

I decided to test the KLK all day at work, to see how well it would hold up when working full-time. That morning, I applied my kit and then some eos lip balm on top because I heard that helps it stay longer? (Could be an urban myth– but it did make it shinier.) Then, at 10:37 am (about forty minutes into my work day), I started noticing little crumblies in the lower corners of my lips. By noon, the kit had officially dried, there was no sticky parts left (color still there).

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Then, by 1:30pm, it was basically all gone after running errands in the heat and drinking a lot of water (NYC life. Fashion intern life.), BUT there was no visible residue on my water bottles (but none left on my lips), so I’m confused about WHERE exactly the color went?!? Then, I put more of my eos balm on, which helped preserve the color a little (I didn’t reapply, as I read you’re not supposed to with the KLK).

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At 3pm (hardly the end of the work day), the lip color was completely gone and my lips were completely bare, except they were stained a little darker than normal. However, the lip liner was still there, just the matte gloss/ lipstick, not really– but I still felt stickiness from it. I wonder how well the lip liner would work with other lipsticks?

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All in all, I LOVE the color (and I instantly feel cooler wearing it, so bonus??), but practically? It’s just not very long-lasting, which I don’t like or want in a lipstick.

Well, I tried it… Will I wear it again? Yes, but not for an extended period of time, because KLK can’t handle it.

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New post. New thoughts.

Hi everyone. Sorry I haven’t had much time to devote to this blog recently: a journalist’s job is never done, as I’ve been crazy busy with homework, class projects and everything thing else I’ve overcommitted myself to. (But, I sort of love my life that way.)

I thought I’d just sit in ramble for today’s post. Just talk.

What’s been happening since I last posted?

  1. George Clooney is officially off-the-market and married an amazing high-profile human rights lawyer.
  2. I’ve become obsessed with “Once Upon a Time” AND “How to Get Away With Murder.” As well as, “Manhattan Love Story,” “A to Z,” “Red Band Society”  and of course, Greys and Scandal. Great shows, start watching. (I mean, #TGIT, anyone?)
  3. The whole Ebola news thing everyone should be aware of is big news.
  4. Applying to study and intern in NYC this summer and London this fall. (Dream: to intern at a publication like Seventeen. Fingers crossed!)
  5. I interviewed a major YouTube star (“HelloKaty”) and wrote a profile on that. Read it here.
  6. One Direction announced the track list for their fourth studio album, “Four.”
  7. Neil Patrick Harris will host the 2015 Oscars.
  8. Taylor Swift’s new pop album “1989” will be released any day now. And “Out of the Woods” may be inspired by a Mr. Harry Styles.
  9. Everyone’s been obsessing over “American Horror Story” which stars my camp alum, Emma Roberts.
  10. The Kansas City Royals will officially be playing in World Series. (GO CARDINALS!)

One thing I’ve noticed about the world: is such a huge focus on the superficial sides. And while, I love fashion and celeb gossip, I admit that’s not what matters: family, doing what you love, etc– that’s what matters, not what you wear or how popular you are, it’s how you perceive yourself and who you want to be. No one can belittle who you are or tell you who to be except for yourself. Be brave, be strong, be yourself. Because no one else for stick up for yourself other than you.

I just wish more girls, and people in general, would be able to be 100 percent themselves and not worry about how others perceive them. So, if you want to wear a certain outfit or attain for a certain career: go for it. Chase your dreams. Be a superstar. Be amazing. You are amazing. You don’t need anyone else to tell you that. Your opinion is the only one that matters.

Alright, I’m off to watch Greys, Scandal and the Cardinal game, as well as work on some essays. Thanks for reading. xx

1D Update

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Okay, yes. I’m a One Direction fan. There music is exactly the type I like to listen to.

And guess what, fellow directioners? A new album is coming, November 14 to be exact. And it’s titled “Four.” I have no idea why it’s named that, but I hope it has a symbolic meaning, other than it’s the fourth album, because that’s not clever.

Follow the link below and you can pre-order the album and hear an exclusive track, “Fireproof.” I have no idea where this track came from, certainly not from the 1D we knew from the past three albums. But, it’s good. More mature. Maybe too mature for the 13-year-old fans, but for the college-aged fans like moi, it’s clear we’re the target demo.

http://www.onedirectionmusic.com

Enjoy the audio track below! xx