14 Books I Could Re-Read Over and Over Again

Sure, I have a long TBR and a completely full bookshelf (so full that I just had to purchase another shelf because I have too many books), but sometimes you just want to read something comforting. Something that you loved so much and connected to so much, that you just have to re-read it. Hey, it happens.

So, here’s a list of some of the books from my bookshelf to yours that I could just read again and again and never tire of the story.

Four Days of You And Me by Miranda Kenneally

As I’ve previously mentioned, I’ve been reading other books by Miranda Kenneally for years, so drawn to the strong characterizations, friendships, and of course HEA and love stories. And her latest YA novel has not disappointed me. It’s teeming with dramatics, yet feels grounded and relatable, and I love it no matter how many times I restart it.

Read The Book

 

 

 

 


Meet You in the Middle by Devon Daniels

I’ve legit read my digital ARC some 3-4 times in completion by now, and then just the HEA an additional 2-3 times when I want to feel that level of comfort all over again. This romance novel is just that cute, yet grounded. A slow-burn can be hard to feel connected to, but Kate and Ben’s quick-witted, feisty, and playful banter makes it delicious. That, and you can’t keep me from a good enemies-to-lovers book; that makes the inevitable romance so much more earned and justified by the time the HEA does happen. I just can’t wait to order a physical copy, so I can read this story an additional ten more times.

Read The Book: Available beginning May 4, 2021

 


The Royal We by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan

Gimme a royal romance book any day of the week and I’ll devour it. This book and its sequel have everything I love: regal characters, a sweeping romcom-worthy love story, and London as a setting. It’s basically Prince William and Kate Middleton’s love story but fictionalized, as if she was American. And I love it — every single time I pick it up off my shelf for a reread. Both books are so full of drama and emotion, which like, it has everything I want in a book.

Read The Book

 

 


Eligible by Curtis Sittenfeld

This book is a modern-day retelling of Pride and Prejudice, so right off the bat, it’s already intriguing. There’s a slew of interesting characters, and it still feels new and current, even if many of the stories are based on a classic. Plus, Liz and Darcy eventually discover they have feisty back-and-forth banter that’ll translate very well into crazy, unexplainable chemistry. Even though the page count may seem daunting, I’ve still managed to polish off a reread in a single day.

Read The Book

 

 


The Trouble With Hating You by Sajni Patel

Seriously, re-reading this gave me all of the zings and goosebumps, even more than the first time. Like, every time I read this, and Jay and Liya realize their feelings, I swear, I can feel my heart beating so loud. This romance read is sweeping, romantic, and adorable. It’s hard to resist.

Read The Book

 

 

 

 


Act Like a Lady by the LadyGang

The hosts and besties behind the “LadyGang” podcast wrote this advice-filled, self-help, and humorous guidebook about what it means to be a woman in the twenty-first century. It’s a fun yet relatable book essays that’ll inspire just about any girl to rise up and be a powerful force to be reckoned with. From taking on lessons with dating, friendship, career, self-confidence, and more, it’s all the message we all need to hear more. It’s empowering as heck and something most women should have in their arsenal to remember. These pearls of wisdom make a perfect coffee table book for any millennial apartment. You can read this in a day, you can read it again and again because it’s evergreen, it’s timely, it’s what you just need to hear every once and a while. 

Read The Book


One to Watch by Kate Stayman-London

I loved this ARC so much, I had to preorder the hardcopy in advance of its pub day. It’s the exact type of women’s fiction novels that I love. It’s so refreshing, endearing, authentic, sweeping, and just tons of fun. It tackles the world of The Bachelor if they’d cast more body positive and diverse contestants, and that’s all we want, ABC; it’s real life. All. We. Want. Anyway, this book is funny and witty; equal parts empowering, glamorous, and indulgent and I was so drawn in by the entire premise and plot twists.

Read The Book

 

 


No Offense by Meg Cabot

It’s such a fun read, and one I couldn’t put down while I devoured each chapter of my ARC. Now, that it’s officially out to the world, I can’t wait to get my hands on a hard copy and fall in love with this bookish romance. Leads John and Molly have such a bright spark between the two of them, and like, wowza, I’m obsessed and just have stars in my eyes. There’s romance, friendship, small-town gossip, and a big mystery full of intrigue; it has everything!

Read The Book

 

 


By the Book by Julia Sonneborn

I’ve re-read this bookish romance countless times since I first grabbed it off of a Barnes & Noble shelf years ago. It’s just completely precious and enduring. This novel isn’t too cheesy-romantic, but feels honest, realistic, and current. Like, for any book nerds out there, there’s one of the most sweeping romantic scenes in this book — and it happens twice! Plus, Adam builds Anne her dream library, which makes me melt even more.

Read The Book

 

 

 


You Deserve Each Other by Sarah Hogle

The second I finished this ARC, on a one-way plane ride, I knew I had to order a hardcopy. To which, I re-read in a single day when it arrived. It’s not any ordinary romance, because it starts out just the opposite. But, with time and pages, you get to see firsthand how Nick and Naomi slowly warm to each other again as accomplices, teammates, best friends, and lovers to become even stronger. It’s not a romance where you expect the lead couple to be together without any problems, but Nicholas and Naomi have to work for love and to open up, discovering who they are as individuals in the process. By the time they reclaim their love, it feels earned and justified. It’s well-written and intriguing and had me hanging onto every last word.

Read The Book


Girl Gone Viral by Alisha Rai

As soon as I read this contemporary romance ARC, I was hooked. So, much so, that I had to preorder a physical copy the moment I finished it. I couldn’t put it down, any time I’ve re-started, it’s just so intriguing, fun, and squeal-worthy. Like, Kat has all the zings between her and Jas, and just from reading, so do I. I couldn’t stop smiling for one moment while reading; I was hooked from the very first page.

Read The Book

 

 

 


Love York Life by Sophie Kinsella

The minute I finished this ARC, I was hooked. It’s a lighthearted, fun holiday romance slash opposites-attract love story. This book has such an engaging tone and perspective that keeps me reading into the wee hours of the morning, because Ava’s such a relatable lead and I need to find out what happens next. It’s a cute, steamy, fun, and indulgent holiday romance, that’s so fun and enjoyable to read that I finished in a single setting. Once the rose-colored glasses of their holiday romance wears off, neither of them want to split because they believe they are meant to be and this is real, despite being polar opposites in nearly every sense. Together, they’ve managed to expand each other’s views, and that’s real love: That you can accept that what you think isn’t the end-all-be-all that you think it might be, but rather that they could try something new and still accept one another. It’s not an easy love story, because, hey, life isn’t easy, and I think that’s why I loved it so much. It’s honest, vulnerable, and authentic. It’s funny, witty, romantic, emotional, and heartfelt. So many emotions in one book and that’s why I fell hard for this book. Wow, just incredible.

Read The Book: Available beginning October 27


Heiress Apparently (Daughters of the Dynasty) by Diana Ma

This was an unexpected five-star read that I still can’t stop thinking about, because I just want to start over and read again. It’s like Crazy Rich Asians meets American Royals, and since I loved both books, this was obviously a must. And every part of the text lives up to that. It’s a coming-home story and one of pursuing her dreams. Once Gemma meets her doppelganger cousin, she begins to discover a long-held family secret. This book is so intriguing, and if a full series is actually coming, then I CANNOT WAIT! The book is full of drama, secrets, dreams coming true, and it’s so captivating and engaging. It’s a meaningful story about a family’s bond. It’s more than just a YA story, it is so rich and wow, I loved it. Every single page, chapter, and character. 

Read The Book: Available beginning December 1


You Had Me at Hola by Alexis Daria

This is the absolute perfect summer beach read of the year, and I enjoyed devouring every single morsel of Jasmine and Ashton’s journey to love in my ARC. Readers are thrust into soap star Jasmine’s fast-paced Hollywood world immediately, and I’m captivated and just want to keep reading. Both telenovela star Ashton and Jasmine have their own complex backstories, which makes them so much more vulnerable, intriguing, and dynamic as characters. It’s a quick, indulgent telenovela-inspired romance read and I’m obsessed.

Read The Book

Here We Go Again: Judging Clare Crawley’s Suitors on ‘The Bachelorette’ on First Glance

Now that many places are starting to come out of quarantine and resume somewhat normal lives, it’s time for Bach Nation to get back on track. The Bachelorette, now set exclusively at a California resort, is set to resume filming with Clare Crawley’s journey with 42 brand-new suitors (sans Matt James for obvious reasons). Right before filming kicked off, the show revealed a sneak peek of the men vying for Clare’s heart. A few things: They did *slightly* age up her men, which thank god. Hopefully, that means less drama and more right-reasons folks. PLEASE. But then, there are only 12 POC contestants. Twelve out of 42 is barely .2 percent. Also, there’s barely any other diversity besides race and age. Like, IRL not everyone looks like models. Come on, ABC.

OK, rant time over. Now, that we have the official names, ages, hometowns, and headshots of these guys, it’s time for my annual thoughts based on first impressions alone. Obviously, I’m basing this post off of first impressions from a photo and whatever info I can Google about each man for now. But, once we get closer to a premiere and get an official bio and fast facts from the network, this post may be amended. (Then, hopefully, I can bring back my favorite “Can We Just” segment.)

AJ, 28

Now, this Irvine, California native may still be a bit too naive or young for Clare. But, they do live only six hours apart. Could that help jumpstart a potential future and real life? Based on his photo, he looks very All-American and a picture-perfect white dude.

He has a private Instagram account, so we can’t do much snooping. But his bio reads, “Likable Lothario” which yikes, but also “future stay-at-home-dad.” Huh. It also boasts that he’s a college grad and a current MBA student.

 


Alex, 28

This El Paso, Texas guy also skews on the younger side of things. Which, IDK. Again, a basic All-American white guy. He does look quite sweet and cute. I can see him being a hit in Paradise.

Another dude with a private Insta, but his bio boasts his interest in health and fitness, “good livin'” whatever he means by that, and that he has two lil pups and is a “dog dad.” If that’s not the definition of basic. He is on LinkedIn too, but only has 63 connections, so I’m not sure if he’s that into his professional career or genuinely doesn’t know how to use LinkedIn. However, his name’s been in the limelight because some eagle-eyed fans spotted that he’s been arrested quite a few times. So, like, ABC, are we doing background checks anymore?


Ben, 29

We’re aging up just a smidge with this Indianapolis guy. (Hey, do you know Ben Higgins? LOL.) Giving me weird hair vibes and I’m not into it.

He also as a private Insta page, but his bio describes him as “your coach.” Excuse me as I go throw up. And apparently, he’s a fitness trainer. Blech times two.

 

 

 


Bennett, 37

Here we go, we’re getting the age right! Finally. More men that could be on the same page as Clare. Praise be. He’s from Atlanta and seems bubbly and personable, but for some reason, I’m getting a smarmy vibe that maybe he’s too perfect?

Insta gives us no clues, but LinkedIn does. He’s a professional living in NYC with a real-life adult job. So, one step already. I thought I saw a too-perfect vibe, and I was right. His LinkedIn headshot, a degree from Harvard, yea, I feel that I was definitely right. I’m just confused: he graduated in 2007, and then immediately became a Senior VP for a major corporation in finance? I just have questions or he has no clue how LinkedIn works and inputted dates wrong. I’d give him a chance though because this picture from Facebook shows kind eyes and a smile. So, I guess maybe you can’t always judge a book by its cover. But, not even if it’s a slick one??


Blake Monar, 30

Another Indiana guy and he is tatted up. Seriously, his arms are covered. His hair’s doing a weird swoopy, pompadour thing which, eh. And I just get a bad boy, drama-centric vibe. But thanks to the network for giving us his last name that makes my sleuthing job much easier. Turns out, he is the President and CEO (humble much?) of a men’s grooming business in Phoenix called Statum Style. Oh no, is he a Nick Viall 2.0? Oh, and he models. Great.

Thanks to his modeling agency in Phoenix, we know now his height, measurements, eye color, and shoe size too, LOL. Oh, and in case you cared, his company Statum Style is all-natural.

 


Blake Moynes, 29

No, we really have two Blake M’s??? Ok, he doesn’t have tattoos and is from Ontario. So, we have Tatted Blake and Canadian Blake. That helps. In a shock to no one, this tall Canadian prospect was apparently a hockey player in college. Thank you, Google.

He has no known Insta page, which makes my quest for info more difficult. So, I guess we’re going in blind here.

 

 

 

 


Brandon, 28

Wow, he looks a little intense. This Cleveland, Ohio dude apparently doesn’t smile in casting photos and it makes him less than personable. Also, this is totally a photo you’d find on his Tinder. Oh someone, please come through and confirm this. Looks like a model or something, which, pass.

Based on his Insta, also private, he’s a luxury real estate agent and a model based in NYC. According to his firm’s site, he is interested in acting, art and architectural history, traveling, food, yoga, and skiing. I’ve read enough, I’m done.

 


Brendan, 30

No, and we have a Brandon and a Brendan? My head hurts already. The Massachusetts guy seems physically perfect and that’s really all I can gauge from a photo.

According to his Insta (still public!), he’s an artist, but like based on the photos, he’s also a model. Geez, we’re screwed then if most of her men are models. Aka classic wrong reasons types.

 

 

 


Chasen, 31

He’s also from Cali, and just an hour from Clare. Good or bad, IDK yet. Looks like a model, so yea.

Based on his Insta, he’s into fitness and a tech consultant. Oh yea, and he models too. Because, obviously. But, he does seem to have a legit, real-person job, so there’s that.

 

 

 

 


Chris, 27

He’s from St. Louis, Missouri. OMG, where did he go to high school? I need to know. That would supremely help out his first impression. He may bring the median age down, but like I just need to know about his background in my hometown. Would give me plenty of insight.

Other than that, I literally cannot find anything about him on social media. So, I guess, I’m going in blind here too.

 

 

 


Collins, 30

He’s from Midlothian, Virginia and his arms are massive and he has an intense (scary?) wide smile.

There’s nothing much I can find on this dude besides his Instagram account or a couple of weightlifting training videos. So, yea, my first impression doesn’t bode well from that. Although it seems like his grandparents were in the hospital four weeks ago, right before he left for ABC quarantine. I do hope everything will be okay, because my stomach would be in knots every day I’m on a reality show knowing something could happen back home while I’m on the opposite coast.

 

 


Dale, 31

He’s from Brandon, South Dakota, and is that a first for the show?? He seems nice and normal. While his IG is private, turns out he’s VERIFIED already. He’s actually a former NFL player and now is a model and a host, plus an ambassador for the Special Olympics. He’s giving me Clay vibes but like I’d actually root for him. That smile and he doesn’t seem too cocky, just the right amount of normal. Yea, I’m on his team. If Clare doesn’t pick him, can he be the Bachelor lead after Matt James? I’d watch that season.

 

 

 


Demar, 26

Hey, look a baby for the class! He’s from San Diego and I just get a feeling that he’s still in that party, going out stage of life. Based on his IG, I was a little nervous about the @djfromsocal handle, that he’d be a tool or a cocky DJ but it’s just his initials. He’s educated with a Bachelors and a Masters. Yay, we stan driven contestants! Except hold your horses, his bio advertises something called the Madison, which is a “Party on a Bike: partying you won’t regret the next day.” Oof, I retract my previous affirmative stance. Oh, and he models too. Ugh.

 

 


Ed, 36

Age-appropriate, yes. But, geez, his arms. They are massive and the veins are popping out. Good lord. So clearly, this Pittsburgh guy works out a lot. I can’t seem to find any other deets on this dude, but my gut is saying no. I’m getting like a Chad meets Jed vibe, which is like the biggest red flag EVER.

 

 

 

 


Ellis, 26

Oh, look at lil’ ginger baby Ellis. The 26-year-old from Libertyville, Illinois has quite the baby face, which hinders me from seeing him as someone ready for marriage and a lifetime commitment. You know, Ellis, it’s hard to stalk, erm you know, research you when your name is the same as a street in your town. Gah, whatevs for now.

His IG presence is private, yet gives me a first and last name so I can find out his LinkedIn deets and previous college basketball record. Lol and in case you were wondering, I’m third connections with the Dallas-living sales executive hahahaha.

 


Garin, 34

Age is definitely in the right zone with this Fort Lauderdale, Florida dude. Giving me Kenny vibes from Rachel’s season. They look alike in the faces.

Based on his IG bio, Garin is an Emmy-nominated journalist who writes for THISISRNB.com, and is also a host, director, and professor at USC. He’s a freelancer in LA, but hey, same state as Clare. It does say he’s a “nice guy finishing first,” which okay, hun, I can roll with that.

 

 


Gary, 29

He’s from Cleveland, Ohio, and seems like a professional. Also, the provided Facebook photo looks blurry and I can’t tell much else. Have no strong opinion on him with a blurry photo and no social clues to search.

 

 

 

 


Ivan, 28

This Dallas guy seems fine, a bit basic. Meh. And definitely on the skinnier side. He’s an engineer, as it said on his private IG’s bio. We’re also third connections on LinkedIn, LOL, but he’s wearing a cute pair of glasses in his headshot and he definitely needs to wear those full time. Glasses can make most guys more attractive. What, it’s true.

 

 

 

 

 


Jason, 31

They are really delivering on the age thing, which thank god. He’s from Rutland, Vermont, and is he our first one? He’s got some large ink on his bicep, so we’ll see what Clare thinks of that. But, he seems genuine and honest, like he’s looking for something real. I’d vote for him to get a couple of roses from Clare.

Another verified Insta dude for Clare. His bio reads, “A regular at Wegmans buffet line and WaWa. URI alum. Former fat guy for the NFL/CFL player.” So, we’ve got another former footballer. He seems basic but a good friend and family guy, which bonus points, man.

 

 


Jay, 29

He’s from Langhorne, Pennsylvania, and seriously he’s like a Tyler C. clone. I cannot unsee it. Apparently, he’s private on Insta with no real bio and ick, I get bro-y vibes based on his profile photo.

 

 

 

 

 

 


Jeremy, 40

What? They actually found someone in their forties?? Gobsmacked. He’s from Virginia Beach and aside from the weird Facebook photo seems normal-ish. They better not send him to Paradise with the 20-year-olds from Peter’s season, please no.

His Insta tells me nothing, legit nothing. Just that it’s the same guy because his headshot looks like him, and oh, that he has a little line or something tattooed on his arm. Oh, turns out, he’s got a real job. Score one.

 

 


Joe, 36

He’s from North Woodmere, New York, and just seems decent and like he’d be mature.

Thanks to a local news article, they’ve already dug up this dirt on this suitor. He’s an anesthesiologist, which like, a real grown-up job! IDK if Clare’s gonna fancy him but he seems like a stable, mature contender.

 

 

 

 


Jordan C., 26

He’s from Southington, Connecticut, and he’s got glasses. A four-eyed friend! I think that’s a show first? You know, someone wearing more than just readers in the early hours?

Based on his IG, I’m definitely getting bro vibes. Oh yea, that’s for sure. He’s a big sports guy apparently, which like join the club, man. Meh, nothing else noteworthy to report.

 

 

 


Jordan M., 30

Geez, how many Jordans too? He’s from Deerborn, Michigan, but there’s something about his vibe that I don’t 100 percent trust right away. He just looks menacing and like he’s mean-mugging. I wish he’d smile, then I could get a better vibe/read off of him.

Different from his mean mug photo, his LinkedIn looks more personable and friendly. Meh, not bad.

 

 

 

 


Josh, 31

I swear, there’s something in this Minneapolis, Minnesota-based dude’s face that reminds me of a guy that lived on my dorm floor my freshman year of college. Well, I cannot unsee that now. But, dimples alert! OK, back to the real him. He seems normal and basic, a bit too slick, I think. Also, another man with a legit job. Thank god. His Insta claims he’s a doggy dad, and his doggo Kingsley is a precious lil pooch. I mean, he’s a cutie doggy.

 

 

 


Karl, 33

I’m pretty sure this Miami guy lives in a high-rise, or at least has a friend in one that lets him take photos there. He also has massive arms.

While his IG is private, I’m getting bad vibes because he put a freaking rose emoji next to his name! Like, he wants to be recognized from the show. No no no! #NoMoreWannabeInfluencers. Aside from that, he’s a speaker and a “success coach” who’s founded his own firm and passionate about that, which you do you, hun.

 

 


Kenny, 39

Nope, buh-bye. This dude from Oaklawn, Illinois gives me so many red flags, from the muscle tank, tattoo sleeves, shiny forehead (one word: skincare!), huge muscles, and a gelled-up hairstyle. Please, don’t do it, Clare. Consider this my official warning for you. Also, you know this photo was ripped straight from his Tinder profile.

According to his IG, he’s got a bad-boy-looking headshot and he’s a talent buyer, a “band maker,” and a model. GAH, why why why.

 

 


Mike, 38

Okay, I like this guy from Calgary in Canada. He seems sweet and kind, has nice hair, and a lovely smile. Ohh, Canada. I hope slick former fiance Benoit doesn’t spring to her mind when she meets him. But, I really like this one.

I swear, no critiques here because he’s my top pick and sorta reminds me of Tanner Tolbert, just like a wholesome and nice guy type. His IG doesn’t reveal anything. Wait, noooo, he apparently has a profesh Insta as a “Digital Media Content Creator” with a website that doesn’t exist. Shit, I hope he’s not here to build a brand. Crap, I need him to be a good one and prove my picker is not broken.

 


Montel, 30

He’s from Hingham, Massachusetts, and has a lovely, very white smile. Almost, distractedly so, like blinding. And damn, he’s a personal trainer. Big into fitness and lifting weights, which makes sense because arms, but like, pass.

 

 

 

 

 


Noah, 25

Oh, here’s our little baby of the group! In fact, that’s literally his Insta handle. He’s from Tulsa, Oklahoma, and is definitely here to head to Paradise to meet either Hannah Ann, Madison, or Hannah Brown. Guaranteed.

So, he’s a travel nurse, which like good for him. And apparently, he’s got a twin. In case you wanted to know. He’s um, very religious and kinda preachy.

 

 

 


Page, 37

I’m getting Evan Bass vibes from this Sante Fe, New Mexico guy. I just, but you know, it all worked out for Evan in the end. So, I’m keeping my mouth shut on that. Also, he has a lot of tats and a weird Evan-like slicked-back hairdo. Definitely an artsy, hipster vibe.

Hold the phone, he’s a chef? And like, an acclaimed one at that. Damn, can we get a cooking date? Please, ABC?

 

 

 


Peter, 32

Another perfect-looking Peter here! Is that a rule or something, like if you name your kid Peter then he has to be perfect-looking?? #PerfectPeterStrikesAgain. He’s from Everett, Massachusetts, and just wow, that is so much physical beauty, objectively. He’s clean-shaven and his hair is coiffed to perfection, different from many of these rugged, tatted-up guys he’ll be living in the resort with.

Professionally, he’s a real estate advisor and very confident in his profesh accomplishments. Like, I can’t look at him because he’s just like too handsome.

 

 


Riley, 30

I just love this Detroit lad’s name. Also he seems down-to-earth and normal. He seems approachable, friendly, and chill. Like he’d have your back. No further deets to report other than he’s got a real job and multiple degrees. He seems decent like he’s here to find love, but is also a decent friend to the guys. Good on you, hun.

 

 

 

 

 


Robby, 31

I’m getting Blake E meets Tickle Monster vibes for this man from St. Pete Beach, Florida. IDK what it is, but yea, it’s there. And meh, not much of a fan. Also, seriously questioning the photographer’s skills because it’s framed poorly.

I’m getting all sorts of bro vibes from his Insta, which like I’m gonna pass on this one. He was a frat bro and works for what I assume is a family company which like, is that good family values or nepotism, IDK.

 

 


Spencer, 30

This dude from La Jolla, California looks like Trevor from Listen to Your Heart. Very visually pleasing physically and wow, what a busy and distracting shirt. But, like piercing eyes. I mean, piercing, wow.

And we’ve got another bro out here! His Insta tells that story all too well. But with only sixty posts, I can’t get too much of a read on him.

 

 

 

 


Tien, 36

He’s from Great Neck, New York, and quite the skinny dude. But, also dimples. This photo looks like one of the OBC of Hamilton‘s star portraits of the Schuyler sisters in the sepia tone. Can’t unsee that one.

No Insta, but a real job. So definite benefits and someone who doesn’t wanna be an influencer.

 

 

 

 


Tyler C., 27

Another Tyler C.?? He’s from Gassaway, West Virginia, and just seems like a basic, muscly guy. Totally average Bach suitor, for sure.

While he used to be a professional boxer, now he’s an attorney. Which, like, yay, real job alert!

 

 

 

 

 


Tyler S., 36

Tyler No. 2 is here, y’all! He’s from Dallas and has a lil baby face, so he looks a lot younger. Apparently, his brother is Granger Smith, a country singer? Hm, need to do more digging on this. Yea, and he’s also his bro’s manager and a proud uncle. Thank you, detailed Insta bios. So, I’m sensing like a Jordan Rodgers vibe. He’s cute, seems normal and friendly. Yea, I can see something happening with Clare and some chemistry. But, LOL, could they get his bro to sing on a date for them? Even if it’s just over Zoom! I mean, he manages him, so wouldn’t it be his job to bring this chance to his brother, I mean, client??

 

 


Uzoma, 29

He’s from Dallas and is suave. I just get Lincoln vibes, which I hope not, because he was gross. And oh dear old, yet another former NFL player who’s verified on Insta?? I mean, sure he’s good looking but IDK if he’s right for Clare, ya know?

 

 

 

 

 


Yosef, 29

He’s from Mobile, Alabama, and I’m getting model vibes. But also, what does his accent sound like? I need to know. But, I swear if this isn’t a modeling photo. Because that’s all I see here.

I can’t get a good read on him. His IG is private, save for his profile photo which is him with a cute little girl, which is presumably his daughter or niece or sister or something. So, family’s a priority, I guess. Which, like that’s nice.

 

 

 


Zac C., 36

Oh, I like him and can see him going far. He’s from Haddonfield, Pennsylvania, and just seems normal and authentic. Ok, Team Zac C. for now.

Can’t tell much but apparently he’s got a nice, emotional backstory, so he’ll likely appear when the show airs. He’s overcome a lot and aww, I hope he gets the love story he deserves.

 

 

 


Zach J., 37

He’s from Yakima, Washington, which reminds me of iCarly. Hey, I’m a young Millennial! Big guy with big, veiny arms, tight tees, and hair that sticks straight up.

He’s got his hands deep in his pockets! Which of course reminds me of the camp song “Turtle Song” about the turtle with his hands in his pockets and his pockets in his pants? Sorry, my brain is weird. So, now I’ll be singing that every time I see Zach on screen this season.

Back to Zach, he’s a business owner and values his family, which thank ya, Instagram. Oh, yea, his company as already promoted his Bach appearance. Cool beans, Mr. Wannabe Influencer.

 


And that’s the ball game! What did you think of Clare’s guys and who will earn the First Impression Rose or steal her heart? And more importantly, will things be less dramatic and more earnest so I’ll want to keep watching?

10 Adorable New Reads That I’m Obsessing Over Right Now

It’s a crazy, scary, fearful time we live in and sometimes it feels hard to move forward. One way I cope is obviously through reading, and um yea, I’ve been reading a lot. Like, one book every day or every other day. (Hey, it’s the only way to get through my 15+ TBR!) In between devouring the new Hunger Games book, The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, (which I don’t dislike teen Snow, but I don’t exactly like him), about 12 more new ARCs (thanks a million, Netgalley!), and keeping up with my daily responsibilities, I’ve certainly found ways to stay busy. And now, I want to share that knowledge with all you, my lovely readers. And so, welcome back to Miranda’s Book Nook with a handful of my latest book recommendations that are perfect to keep you busy and engaged during this crazy, anxious, and uncertain time. I hope you pick ’em up and fall in love with these rich stories just as I have.

Times Like These by Laura Carter

It’s the story of four different yet close friends, almost like sisters: Hannah, Rosalie, Andrea, and Sofia. They are each at different points in their lives both professionally and personally, and the book does a good job of getting into each character’s mindset.

Each chapter is about a different girl and all are very descriptive in its language. There’s quite a bit of British slang/terms, which sure, makes sense considering the author and publisher, however, the characters are American, which makes these terms all the more confusing and feel out of place. Other than that, I couldn’t stop reading once I was in the depths of it. Sure each character has problems, but they are written with such vulnerability and emotions. Seeing this bond between the girls and the enduring power of friendship is heartwarming to read as these pals must figure out how they fit into each other’s different lives and if their bond is strong enough to survive their different and changing worlds.

Available: June 29


One to Watch by Kate Stayman-London

FIVE-STAR READ ALERT! OK, I don’t know if I can fit into words everything I thought about this book because it was refreshing, endearing, honest, authentic, sweeping, and fun. I couldn’t put it down and absolutely adored it, hence my rating. Before I started reading, I was initially intrigued about seeing a plus-size, body positive lead of a romance/women’s fiction book coupled with the setting of a dating TV show ala The Bachelor. All in all, it was set to perfectly align with my reading habits. And boy, did this book deliver. 

The book followed plus-size fashion blogger Bea Schumacher, who becomes the new show lead of the hit Main Squeeze reality show after her tweets and blog post about the show’s lack of diversity goes viral. And after a major breakup that left her reeling, this is the perfect chance to get over that and up her brand all at once. While she claims she’s only here to promote better beauty messages and not to fall in love, things get complicated when she meets some dashing, charming suitors who may help her find the real-life HEA she didn’t know she was missing.

Think: The Bachelor with a lead who was body positive and proud, because hey that’s reality, darling. This book is funny and witty; equal parts empowering, glamorous, and indulgent. It’s very juicy, like I just kept exclaiming ‘OMG’ out loud, sorry not sorry; I’m so intrigued and hooked. Then, the “show” ending is bold yet confident, because hey, a woman doesn’t need a man and shouldn’t settle for anything. The actual book ending was absolutely precious and so darn cute, and besides, now I need a Bea+Asher follow-up like right now. This book should be required reading for any dating reality show producer, because this is what we want and need. The book’s language is so fun and relatable; I just wanted to keep reading and couldn’t put it down! It’s chock full of dramatic twists and turns, and I loved every page of it. The book is told through tweets, blogs, contracts, articles, scripts, Slack messages, and texts which help move the time frame along from episode-to-episode.

It’s for sure a five-star read from me because when I can’t put a book down and need to know more, it’s because I’m so invested and captivated by the storytelling. While the title is One to Watch, you know who is the real one to watch? Author Kate Stayman-London. If this book is any indication, then I can’t wait to see what future works she could deliver that are just as witty, unique, and fun.

Available: July 7


Hello, Again by Isabelle Broom

If you prefer a romance where everything ends neatly in a sugary sweet HEA, then this is not the book for you. It’s more of a women’s fiction novel with its ambiguous, open-ended conclusion. But that shouldn’t take away from this book’s merits, because everything about this feels authentic, realistic, and genuine. This book starts on the anniversary of Pepper’s sister’s death, which hits her and her mom hard every year. When her friend, local widow Josephine, asks her to come along on her European trip as a companion, it’s the perfect chance for Pepper to try something new and do something her sister always wanted. So, in a quite predictable yet adorable meet-cute, Pepper runs into the German-accented dreamboat Finn on her first day, and immediately he only has eyes for our colorfully dressed protagonist. She definitely believes in fate and true love at her core, and I can already tell it’ll be a fun holiday fling/romance from those early chapters.

The book follows their relationship across various cities and countries as they pursue a fast-paced relationship, the highs and the lows included. Finn is the perfect, sweet, admiring, and all-in love interest and while it’s charming, it feels a bit too perfect because there’s a big truth bomb on the horizon that’ll shake Pepper to her core. Once he reveals what’s going on, he immediately wants nothing to change and them to be okay, but it’s not just about them anymore, so that made me dislike him a tad, because I was starting to root for him.

So, obviously, there is some romance, but that part moves so quickly, and there’s a possibility that they won’t end up together by the time he drops his truth. Sure, he taught her to open up and be herself, but they do love each other and that’s all that should matter. Boo, that ending makes me sad because I wanted to invest in them together. Then, there’s an epilogue, but the two of them aren’t really addressed as the two of them, and like, I just want to know what happened to them. I mean, I hope hope hope that they found their way back to each other because his “first piece of love” title of her work may indicate that or if they both move on or if they never do. I just want more, more answers, more of the captivating story.

Available: July 9


A Sweet Mess by Jayci Lee

Within a few pages, I can already tell this book is shaping up to be a sugary-sweet romance, and it didn’t let me down. One thing is that the book switches perspective between Landon and Aubrey abruptly at a new paragraph, which is confusing at first. Also, the timeline abruptly jumps in places, which this swap is too sudden and out of nowhere mid-chapter. But, all in all, it’s a fun and indulgent romance read and I thoroughly enjoyed it. It gets juicy and dramatic, and I’m loving it!

In the book, Aubrey Choi is happy running her successful bakery Comfort Zone and doesn’t need dating to fill her days. She has her business and baked goods to keep her busy. Then, enter the gorgeous stranger Landon Kim. After a one-night-stand, maybe it’s time for Aubrey to reevaluate her priorities? Well, it turns Landon is a celebrity food critic and he published a scathing review of her bakery that may just ruin her business and the thoughtful memories of their night together. Once Landon realizes, ‘Oh crap, I just panned the girl I like’s business and the order I had was actually a custom cake for a child and not meant for me,’ he seeks a way to clean up his mess without mucking up his reputation. So, he offers her a spot on a new celeb cooking show that he’s producing. She agrees for the positive press, but soon the two of them are all alone in a California villa in wine country for three whole week. And yes, all that chemistry is certainly a recipe for something.

The two protagonists have such an undeniable chemistry that it made the read so engaging in this slow-burn, friends-to-lovers book. I couldn’t put this book down; It’s just an enjoyable, indulgent, and cute love story. The character of Aubrey is so raw and vulnerable, it’s real and makes it more appealing and authentic as a reader. It’s chock full of twists and turns, yet turns out to be pretty darn cute; absolutely precious. Then, when Landon has realized he’s been a total idiot at the end, it’s such a sweeping and swoon-worthy HEA. This story was so emotional, it just had my entire heart. All that raw, real emotion makes the HEA earned, justified, better, and cuter.

Since the book’s release, it was announced that actor Daniel Dae Kim will produce and star in a film adaptation. While we don’t have further details, now I really, really, really need to see him as Landon eating and choking on that PB, Chocolate, and Gummy Worm custom cake. I need that scene, and I will laugh.

Available: July 14


More Than Maybe by Erin Hahn

First off, I love a good British love interest, so this book got started on the right foot with all the slang. The book’s casual language feels authentic and relatable, even through its dual perspectives.  Luke and Vada are cut from the same cloth and a perfect match in this slow burn, cute Young Adult romance.

Our two protagonists of this book are podcaster and shy songwriter Luke and ambitious music blogger Vada. Luke’s been living in the shadow of his punk rocker dad’s spotlight, his outgoing twin brother Cullen. But he has a major secret: he’s been big-time crushing on Vada and always finds a way to stalk her blog, and just yearns for a way to chat with her. Meanwhile, Vada’s the girl with the big dreams to get into an amazing college program for music journalism, manage her mom’s boyfriend’s local music venue/bar, and get a dream internship. Falling for Luke was certainly not part of her plan, but hey, we are where we are. They have so much in common and when Cullen releases a new track of his brother singing a love song about a mystery girl, maybe she wishes it was about her. And perhaps, Luke feels the same???

It’s a quick, fun, and engaging read that you can polish off in a single setting. It’s a sugary-sweet, slow-burn romance that I couldn’t put down. By the end, it’s so darn cute and very enjoyable to read. Just like her first book, You’d Be Mine, author Erin Hahn perfectly melds the music world with teen romance for such an adorable YA read. Awww. But, I definitely think I preferred this book over You’d Be Mine. Everything just felt so authentic and genuine.

Available: July 21


The Switch by Beth O’Leary

This was a super-sweet, comforting novel for such a weird, strange, and scary time in this world. It focuses on the two Eileens, a grandmother and a granddaughter and their special bond. During a time where each woman is at during this crossroads in their life, both need a break and plan to swap lives and cities, just like the movie The Holiday. Before the swap, the book moves very slowly and every action is long and drawn out with each chapter feeling way too long. But soon enough, the pacing quickens and I got wrapped up in the storyline.

We follow overachiever Leena Cotton who takes a two-month sabbatical at her grandma Eileen’s cozy cottage in Yorkshire after she blows a massive presentation at work. Meanwhile, her 80-year-old grandma is looking for a second chance at love after her husband left her. Since there are more options in London, her granddaughter suggests a switch. While Eileen wines and dines across London and experiences casual dating, Leena heads off to the country to look after her grandmother’s local neighborhood projects and her cottage.

So, my issues with Leena start almost instantly. How can Leena be so insistent to help Betsy with her abusive S.O., yet she’ll believe her cheating boyfriend over her beloved grandma?? Like, no girl, you need to cut him loose: he doesn’t deserve you. Thank god for the ending, phew. 

Eileen’s parts read as far more engaging, she’s so vibrant and fun, and I loved it. Plus, there’s not really a conflict for most of the book, things sort of just happened. Leena wasn’t exactly my favorite protagonist because she didn’t exactly know who she was or saw that nothing wrong with her always-working life or cheating boyfriend. Eileen’s spirit, free and kind, was much more engaging and interesting. Also, Rachel Brosnahan is slated to star in the film adaptation and IDK, but like, surely she’ll be Leena, which isn’t as an interesting part, so I guess we’ll have to wait and see how that’ll shake out. But, in the end, it was an adorable, comforting read.

Available: August 18


Far From Normal by Becky Wallace

It’s the story of a new intern at a posh Chicago sports marketing agency, and a classic fish-out-of-water tale. Maddie is the typical YA protagonist of a normal, All-American, awkward girl but she’s very driven to succeed and follow her passions.

The book uses captivating language, that you really feel for Maddie’s point of view and it’s easy to get sucked in. Soon, intern Maddie is tasked with managing Italian, bad boy soccer star Gabe’s social media, a guy who she’s already had an embarrassing (for her) yet flirty exchange with days prior. He’s the bad boy and it’s up to her to keep him on the straight and narrow path. As we go on, fellow intern Mara is the vindictive office nemesis, which I’m not a fan of this storyline because women need to champion other women. (How in the heck can we shatter glass ceilings if we are too busy fighting and being catty and petty for one seat at the preexisting table?? No, we should be working together to make more space.) So, that characterization irked me.

Overall, I couldn’t stop reading this fun, slow-burn YA romance between a regular girl and a superstar yet misunderstood athlete. Then, once Gabe starts to open up because he honestly likes her, you can see his walls tumble down and his raw, real self emerges just like any ordinary crush, and that’s the love interest I want to root for. It’s a quick read that you get so wrapped up in that you cannot put it down! By the ending, the story is very raw and vulnerable for Maddie, who realizes she can blaze her own trail and not follow anyone else’s.

I was hesitant to read based on the summary, but I took a chance on this book, which completely won me over with its authentic language, sweeping romance, and the vulnerable moment at the end where she’s forged her own path ahead without knowing the end result.

Available: September 22


In A Holidaze by Christina Lauren

A Groundhog’s Day-type holiday romance from the skilled romance mind of Christina Lauren that’s set in a cozy mountain cabin? Call me intrigued immediately. As I started to read, the background on the characters is unclear and just dives right into the story now. It starts with Mae, who visits a Park City, Utah cabin with her family and longtime family friends. So, immediately a love triangle starts when Mae kisses Theo, while she’s had a longtime crush on his brother Andrew. (Reader’s Note: Initially, the book lacked a clear character backstory, because it seemed like both Theo and Andrew were her cousins. Can confirm that they are not.) After a super embarrassing night and morning (I was legit cringing for her, eesh) and then a massive surprise threatens to change everything.

Soon after her mess of things and a horrific car accident, Mae enters a Groundhog’s Day-type of situation where she gets to relive the whole trip to the cabin and get it right. I don’t know, I don’t get the same vibe and interest as I did while reading The Honey Don’t List, meh there seems to be a lot happening and it’s unclear if it is a dream or she’s in a coma or something else. Everything seems so odd and out of context, but I can’t help but be so curious as to see what happens. The 300+ pages don’t feel so long because you get so entrenched in the story and just can’t put it down. 

With every injury and wrong turn, Mae gets a fresh chance to relive it and get things right. Eventually, she learns that change isn’t necessarily a bad thing and to stay true to herself as her reboots buck tradition and allow her to be her true self. In this new alternate timeline, her flirtmance with longtime crush Andrew is so cute, but like I just want to know more details about this time travel situation. Seriously, Andrew and Mae falling is having me believe in soulmates and fate and aww, it’s just precious. Their relationship (and book) starts off slowly and then, whew, things ramp up hot, hot, hot.  (I mean, that closet scene, ahem.) Oh wow, I’m so darn hooked and I cannot stop reading, I just need to finish the story and get resolution about so many things.

I thought this book would end up predictably with the actual reality being the car crash inspiring her to change her life, but no, her final re-done chance was real because she was true to herself, and ahhh that HEA. I loved that super-duper cute happily ever after, awww it’s everything. All in all, it was such a cute holiday romance read.

Available: October 6


This Time Next Year by Sophie Cousens

This book follows Quinn and Minnie, who meet on New Year’s Day in London, which also happens to be both their birthdays. It turns out while he’s always been lucky, she’s been unlucky, which her family attributes to having their lucky name choice (Quinn) stolen by a baby boy who was born on the same day at the same hospital. The story is told through flashbacks on different New Year’s Eves and New Year’s Days, and somehow Quinn and Minnie always ended up at the same place at the same time; as well as a present-day timeline that chronicles how things go since they officially met in 2019.

It’s such an engaging and fun story, I just want to know what’ll happen next. It’s an easy romance read to get wrapped up in, and I couldn’t put it down and ended up devouring it in one sitting. It even reads quickly for 400+ pages. In the book, it’s all about how fate kept entangling their lives from the beginning, so love seems inevitable. OK, it’s pretty darn cute from beginning to end. It’s just fun, sweet, and cute. Then, the ending is giving me all sorts of sweeping *zings* and feels that I could actually feel fluttering in my belly.

Available: October 15


Heiress Apparently (Daughters of the Dynasty) by Diana Ma

Another five-star read, coming at ya! This was such an unexpected yet thoroughly enjoyable YA read. It’s sort of Crazy Rich Asians meets American Royals, when American aspiring actress Gemma Huang books her first acting gig as the lead in an upcoming rom-com movie. The film, shooting on location in Beijing, is Gemma’s first experience in China and almost instantly, she’s mistaken for big-time influencer and heiress Alyssa Chua. Turns out, there’s more to the story and family secrets galore because Alyssa is her actually cousin and they are both descendants of royalty.

At first, we meet Gemma, who’s busy with auditions for toothpaste commercials and bit parts in a movie as the ex-girlfriend, and doing anything it takes to pay her rent and follow her dreams. She meets a gorgeous Asian-American boy and their romance was like cheesy cute, except he’s totally jealous of her immediate success in the field. (Buh-bye!) Her parents immigrated from China before she was born and haven’t gone back nor allowed her to visit, which adds a curious bit of mystery for Gemma’s backstory and the plot. This book reads quickly with its relatable tone and language. It’s a coming-home story and one of pursuing her dreams. Once Gemma meets her doppelganger cousin, she begins to discover a long-held family secret. This book is so intriguing, and if a full series is actually coming, then I CANNOT WAIT!

Of course, what YA contemporary book wouldn’t be complete with a sweeping romance? Enter Eric Liu, a college graduate who literally rescues Gemma from hoards of screaming fans, and also the grandson of her grandpa’s political rival. The book is full of drama, secrets, dreams coming true, and it’s so captivating and engaging. It’s a meaningful story about a family’s (and specifically that of sisters) bond in this coming-of-age and coming into one’s own story. It’s more than just a YA story, it is so rich and wow, I loved it. Every single page, chapter, and character. Now, where can I get some of Mimi’s fashion collection IRL???

Available: December 1


Advance reader copies of each book were provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Listening to My Gut and Critiquing the Cast of ‘Bachelor: Listen to Your Heart’

The Bachelor is getting musical, y’all. Well, technically, they always have been based on who goes on this show but now they are fully embracing that with their latest spin-off, The Bachelor Presents: Listen to Your Heart. 

After the garbage fire that was Pilot Pete’s season (which I stopped watching after episode 2, sorry not sorry) and the shitstorm that is the anxiety-ridden news right now, we need something mindless to lift our spirits. Luckily, ABC is here to do that with the new spin-off, premiering this April. On the show, the cast will *cough cough* journey to find love through musically themed, romantic dates.

Before the show debuts, the network has released the official cast bios for the aspiring musicians, and true to form, I’m here to give my authentic (and likely snarky) first thoughts.

So, it’s time to listen to my heart gut (see what I did there?) and meet the cast.


Bekah, 25

Genre: Musical theater

OMG, finally us musical theater nerds get a bit of representation! According to her bio, she follows her dreams professionally where things are going well, in sharp contrast to her love life. Sound right on par for most contestants.

Can We Just: She hopped a fence, with her mother, to attempt to see Kim Kardashian’s house. And admitted that out loud? Saying she’s never been on a date, sure that’s fair considering the history of this show. But um ok then??


Brandon, 34

Genre: American folk pop

Gasp, someone over the age of 30! He’s a veteran who has found solace in music, so I feel like I can’t be too negative since that’s so lovely.

Can We Just: He once opened for Jason Derulo in Times Square. How? I wanna know more, Derulo’s a sharp contrast from folk-type music.

 


Bri, 28

Genre: Pop

She seems like a hopeless romantic, blah blah blah, how very sugary sweet.

Can We Just: Gluten allergy? That’s your fun fact?

 

 


Cheyenne, 23

Genre: R&B

Look, we have our baby of the class! She wants to find someone with “strong masculine energy,” okie dokie, good luck with that, hun.

Can We Just: LOL, her fun fact is that she’s never been to a nightclub before. Well, sure that tracks, she’s only been legal and able to get in for less than two years.


Chris, 30

Genre: Soul

Paging Adam Sandler, because we’ve got a wedding singer here! Blah blah, he’s passionate to pursue his musical dreams.

Can We Just: Nothing to report here, he seems normal and even used to work for UNICEF, participating in mission trips globally.

 


Danny, 26

Genre: Singer-songwriter

Yea, that tracks based on his headshot. Wow, he has 1 million online followers. What, is that supposed to impress me? Or any girl looking for love? Like, he just looks like he has heartbreak written all over him. Nope, just nope.

Can We Just: He beatboxes too. Pass.

 

 


Gabe, 28

Genre: Soul/ folk

An all-american, Texas boy walks into the mansion… and that’s all I have so far.

Can We Just: Custom stationary. Can I get proof??? (LOL, I love papers, I wanna see!!)

 


Jack, 38

Genre: Country

Yee-haw, how long did it take to find a country artist for this show?? OK, he’s a single father who is looking for a partner to share a future with. That’s nice.

Can We Just: He “has a necklace tattoo in case he ever forgets his real necklace.” No.


Jamie, 21

Genre: Pop country

Scratch what I said earlier, she is our baby of the class! Sweet and fun-loving, apparently, but I get Hannah Ann vibes here. Gulp, here we go again.

Can We Just: The only thing she wants is for a guy to serenade her. That’s it? All you want, sweetie?

 


Josh, 31

Genre: Country and pop

Meh. Divorced, lives in Nashville, trying to make it. I feel like I’ve heard this one before.

Can We Just: Singing. Uber. Driver.

 

 


Julia, 27

Genre: Pop

Could they only find girls that were pop singers or something??

Can We Just: “She cannot wait to meet her husband!” Wow, a little strong there?

 


Mariana, 23

Genre: R&B and pop

Apparently she looks sweet, but has some spice. Oy, that means drama is coming. Ladies, best not stand in her way when it comes to a guy she likes.

Can We Just: Meh, nothing that interesting here.

 


Matt, 32

Genre: Neo-soul

What a shock, he caught “the bug” when we was young and moved to LA.

Can We Just: His “longest relationship has been with his beard.” I just.

 

 


Mel, 27

Genre: Indie rock

She dislikes the modern dating world and dating apps, which, don’t we all, hun. Don’t we all.

Can We Just: She “used to skip class to watch John Mayer videos,” which like, you couldn’t do that after or before classes??

 


Michael Todd, 31

Genre: Singer-songwriter

You know, he’s got a brand to consider when we get his full name. Didja know, he has a single that’s gotten 100,000+ plays on Spotify? Definitely here for his brand. Oy, please tell me he’s not another Jed; I won’t make it the full season!

Can We Just: “The man with two first names” is “the life of the party.” Blech, pass.


Natascha, 33

Genre: Pop

An international pop star, huh? Can you match the success of one Lizzie McGuire and Isabella duo??

Can We Just: She named one of her dogs “Frou Frou.” No joke.

 

 


Ruby, 25

Genre: Indie pop

Country girl, fiddle player, meh nothing else to report.

Can We Just: She’s “performed for all five living U.S. presidents.” Um, my dear, that is what we call a humble brag.

 


Rudi, 24

Genre: R&B and pop

Her hobby is napping, well, you got me there. Naps are great. Just ask Corinne.

Can We Just: “She knows that she has a crazy side,” and she’s volunteering that information to prospective dates and the whole world?

 


Russell, 26

Genre: American folk

An Indiana boy who moved to the Big Apple to pursue his dreams. Very typical.

Can We Just: He’s a knife-throwing instructor. Seriously, don’t wanna get on his bad side.

 


Alright, there you have it, folks. Well, see ya in April, Bach Nation, as we see if this can live up to the Bachelor hype we’ve come to love to hate.

First Impressions on the Women Vying for Roses on ‘The Bachelor’

In case you’ve been living under a rock and missed the news that ABC crowned its new Bachelor leading man as soon as the Paradise beach closed for the season, to absolutely no one’s surprise, it’s Peter. Peter Weber, aka Pilot Pete from Hannah Brown’s most recent Bachelorette season, is a Delta airline pilot ready to take his own flight for love as the new leading man. Can you say “on the wings of love… part two??

Not that Pilot Pete isn’t swoonworthy, sweet, and full of, ahem, stamina, but we’ve had twenty-something seasons of Peters in previous years, and I’m bored. Why couldn’t we have just had Mike?? Or Wills? Gosh, ABC I’m still not over it. (And to the human who told me to my face that Mike got “too boring” after Paradise for the gig, SHAME ON YOU.)

Anyway, like the trash TV viewer I am, I’m still going to watch it. And since the January 2020 premiere date is just around the corner, the network has revealed the cheesy and funny cast bios of the women clamoring for a chance to be Peter’s copilot on this journey of love. Get ready as I reveal my honest first impressions of these influencers-in-training before they step out of the limo on TV this winter.


Alayah, 24

We’ve got our first beauty queen of the season, y’all! She may be Miss Texas now, but it took her four times to win. Maybe four times in Bach Nation is her next calling?? Apparently drama is coming with “familiar faces from her past [resurfacing].” Oy, have we not suffered enough from Hannah B. V. Caelynn??

Can We Just (A new feature where I break down something I just cannot believe a human being has said.): Her favorite social media platform is Reddit. Like, is that still a thing?

 


Alexa, 27

We’ve got a normie! By that I mean, she looks completely normal, like a real person with a sensible moral compass. She may have trouble being vulnerable, so I have a feeling her biggest hurdle to overcome is herself.

Fellow book nerd, FTW!

Can We Just: She moved to a brand-new city through a coin flip. Was that how she applied for this show too? Heads for Bach or Tails for Love Island?

 


Avonlea, 27

I kid you not, she’s actually a cattle rancher. But also a model, because, naturally. Her parents first met when her mom was a flight attendant. Which means, get your Bach bingo card ready for air travel references!! Hello, On the Wings of Love Part II.

Can We Just: “Every time she milks one of her cows, she thanks it for its hard work.” Marie Kondo approved.

 

 

 


Courtney, 26

After two failed relationships this Floridian is looking for a man and her soulmate. She really likes tanning, which like look at her photo; I get it.

Can We Just: Her biggest turn-on is a man in cowboy boots. Like the biggest? Most important quality?

 

 

 

 


Deandra, 23

She’s independent yet really likes to be the center of attention. Well, hun, someone wants to be the Bachelorette right?? Despite being fiercely independent, she still needs a man to kill a spider for her. Very interesting.

Can We Just: Her family has already set aside a seat for Peter at their holiday table just in case she wins. Oops?

 

 

 


Eunice, 23

We’ve got a flight attendant! A reformed sorority party girl, who’s left that lifestyle in the past. I mean, you’ve since graduated college, geez, I would hope so.

Can We Just: Her signature dance moves is the “ponytail helicopter.” What the F is that?

 

 

 

 


Hannah Ann, 23

Serious Hannah G. vibes from this country-girl turned model. Artsy, talkative. Ohhh do I get Alabama Hannah vibes actually?

Can We Just: She’s volunteering to the boy she wants to date (and other future boys she’ll date in Bach Nation) that she lives at home still. Bold choice.

 

 

 

 


Jade, 26

Here we go, y’all. Our second flight attendant of the season. Which air hostess will make the better first impression pun about their shared career in the sky?

Can We Just: She’s a flight attendant yet is very afraid of heights. Like.

 

 

 


Jasmine, 25

Another book nerd, hey, welcome aboard! She seems genuine, normal, and ready to find a husband and start popping out Bach Nation babies. I have a feeling we’ll see her in Paradise this summer.

Can We Just: The man of her dreams will help her build a table. That’s your benchmark goal? Uhhhh, alrighty then.

 

 

 


Jenna, 22

We have our baby of the class! A down-to-Earth Midwesterner who really takes her trivia nights seriously.

Can We Just: Her pet goldfish gives her advice? Is he magic??

 

 

 

 


Katrina, 28

#TheLastSingleGirl or that’s at least how this pro dancer feels in her circle. A cat lady who’s big into Aladdin and Princess Jasmine. Ashley I. vibes, anyone??

Can We Just: she dressed her cat up as her for Halloween, and she dressed up as the cat. Dead serious.

 

 

 

 


Kelley, 27

Seriously, Andi Dorfman is that you?? We’ve got a doppelgänger with this attorney. A focused lawyer with high standards who won’t settle. You Go Girl. I wouldn’t be mad to watch her journey continue in Paradise.

Can We Just: She’s allergic to black tea. That’s a thing? How do you find out about that allergy?

 

 

 


Kelsey, 28

We got another beauty queen fresh from the cornfields! I think Peter’s gonna like her, because it seems like blondes are his type.

Can We Just: Uh oh, she says she’s like an onion. Here we go, Ashley S. 2.0. Yikes.

 

 

 

 

 


Kiarra, 23

A social butterfly who loves to talk. Great, enjoy talking to the press because I think she’ll be an early exit.

Can We Just: She’s “extremely” turned off by teeth grinders. How oddly specific?

 

 

 

 


Kylie, 26

Ohhh, she’s gotta go far, right? A Cali girl, a family girl, and a planner. Seems like she and her mom already have Mr. and Mrs. Weber wedding invites monogrammed already.

Can We Just: She’s looking for a rom-com type of love. But like, that’s all staged and fake? Wouldn’t you want something real?

 

 


Lauren, 26

She’s a BAWSE lady looking for a partner in crime. She seems to have a good head on her shoulders, lets hope a little camera time and future Insta endorsements won’t cloud that.

Can We Just: She gives all her exes exit interviews. I mean, actually kind of brilliant.

 

 

 


Lexi, 26

Also, she looks like she’d be Peter’s type. Oh boy, she’s ready specifically for a baby daddy. Buckle up, Peter.

Can We Just: She’d rather be buried alive than trapped in a room with frogs.

 

 

 

 


Madison, 23

At 23, she’s ready to settle down?? Like, I just don’t understand. Very faith-oriented. Interesting place to be to find love then.

Can We Just: A former basketball girl. Who’s still gloating about her high school glory days.

 

 

 

 


Maurissa, 23

A former teen beauty queen! What a twist. Mazel, congrats on her impressive weight loss.

Can We Just: She likes to break into song when she’s feeling confident. Well, you better rein that in now, because copyright.

 

 

 


Megan, 26

Geez, a third flight attendant? What, were they having a sale? She’s a hopeless romantic who didn’t let her parents’ divorce mess her dreams of true love up. Wow, impressive.

Can We Just: A “face mask enthusiast.” ABC, please make that her lower-third career. Please.

 

 

 

 


Mykenna, 22

Another baby of the crew! She’s a fashion blogger, so clearly, she can’t wait for the FabFitFun Insta deals to start rolling in this spring.

Can We Just: She’s obsessed with Grey’s Anatomy. Gotta get that ABC cross-promotion in, huh?

 

 

 


Natasha, 31

As Demi would call her “the cougar.” Her photo is not a great choice, the ABC photogs did her dirty with this one.

Can We Just: DISCO. YOGA.

 

 

 

 

 


Payton, 23

I can feel it: she’s a Level 5 clinger.

Can We Just: She admits to living in her parents’ basement. Like, thanks for sharing with the class but you definitely did not have to, girl.

 

 

 

 


Sarah, 24

A Southern Belle and book nerd!

Can We Just: She loathes slugs. Like loathes. That’s strong.

 

 

 

 

 

 


Savannah, 27

She’s really ready to get out of Texas. How bout the Bachelor Mansion??

Can We Just: “She enjoys shopping at Revolve” and is really hoping for an endorsement deal after this is over. Sorry, had to give my edits.

 

 

 

 


Shiann, 27

Oof, she’s very unlucky in love. (I feel you, girl.) She loves traveling, so is that why she wanted to apply for this show?

Can We Just: The best part of her body is her lower back. How very specific.

 

 

 

 

 


Sydney, 24

Oof, another unlucky in love girl.

Can We Just: She enjoys planning fantasy vacations for her and her future husband. Why not actually go to those places??

 

 

 

 


Tammy, 24

She’s a house flipper! Hello, mini Joanna Gaines or JoJo Fletcher! She hasn’t told her mom she’s gonna be on the show, well, this bio is certainly one way to break the ice. I’d totally vote for her as Bachelorette, just saying. The 24-year-old young thing gives me pause, but her personality makes me think she’s mature enough or ready. Or at least, she’ll find her person in Paradise.

Can We Just: She doesn’t relate well to “blonde Barbie” types. Well, her time in the Mansion is sure to be quite interesting then.


Victoria F., 25

She wants a man to love her through the good, the bad, and the ugly. Hey, don’t we all?? A yogi and a medical sales rep, I can tell, while she may not find love on The Bachelor, she’ll walk away with some new besties. That is, if she makes it past L.A. dates.

Can We Just: She and her dog are a package deal. Again. bold move to start with that up front.

 

 


Victoria P., 27

Hey, I wonder if my family knows her family since they’re from the same time. Too weird? Ok, bye. Again, she seems like she’s just Peter’s type and will make it far and capture his attention. Ohh, and what do you know, she’s also a former pageant girl. What a shock.

Can We Just: Her biggest fear is chicken served on the bone. Welp. I think that beats scaredy-cat Annaliese.

 

 

 


And those are the ladies ready for the chance to romance Pilot Pete on national television. Who do you think will walk away with the Delta pilot’s final rose and who will snag the first management deal? And will Peter be the next star to compete on DWTS? Stay tuned this January for On the Wings of Love, Part II.

Roasting the New Crop of Suitors on Season 15 of “The Bachelorette”

It’s that time again: the Bachelor Mansion has once again opened its doors to one eligible lady and a brand-new crop of 30 suitors clamoring for her attention and potential hand in marriage.

Before next week kicks off the season, let’s meet the guys. You know the drill by now: based exclusively on the headshots and brief bios, I will run through my first impressions and judgments of these men looking to date 24-year-old former beauty queen and recent college graduate Hannah “Beast” Brown. Let’s get started.

First off, here’s a brief look at each guy giving their best Hannah growling impression (is that supposed to be impressive? k, pls let me know, thx) and a sappy AF pick-up line, which turn around and go. Bye.

Now, the men:

Brian, 30

The Kentucky math teacher, guess what? Likes math. PASS. I mean this line is nice and all: “Brian is passionate about helping his students achieve their dreams and is hoping this journey will lead him to his dream woman,” but like, numbers. Nah, you lost me. But all in all, seems like an all-American yet slightly dorky white male.

Cam, 30

We met him at AFTR, where he rapped and got the first First Impression rose. My feelings were lukewarm even then. His bio stresses he is competitive, the life of the party, and loves The Notebook. Nice to meet you, Cam, and allow me to show you the door. Bye.

Chasen, 27

The Michigan-based pilot apparently chose his career because “women love a man in a uniform.” That’s why you chose your profession? NEXT, puh-lease. He is also a Bach superfan, so you know he can’t wait for his eps to air. Hey, you’ll be posting teasers on Insta weekly, amirite??

Connor J., 28

First off you know it’s a very basic and white season when there are multiple men with the names Connor, Luke, and Tyler. Moving on to lucky bachelor Connor J. His bio says he’s a Southern gentlemen and apparently has manners up the wazoo, but like, isn’t that something all guys say to try and land a girl?

Connor S., 24

He has Bieber fever! I feel like that says it all. Can I inquire what era is his favorite? Like shaggy-haired “Baby-“singing J.Biebs is completely different from mugshot, homeless-looking Biebs. And then, this line just rubs me the wrong way: “Not only is he easy on the eyes,” I just can’t.

Daron, 25

An IT consultant, he–of course– is a former college athlete and self-proclaimed “giant teddy bear.” Clay vibes, anyone??

Devin, 27

The talent manager (maybe he can manage the up-and-coming influencer careers of his soon-to-be housemates??) seems to really take value in love and finding his person. Oh, and also, Wills (from Boring Becca’s season) is a dear friend. Because how dear of a friendship could it be if all of ABC’s viewers didn’t know about it??

Dustin, 30

He just wants love, and by someone who will meet the approval of his mama and precious pooch.

Dylan, 24

This is just a sea of basic AF white boys, isn’t it?? The “handsome engineer” (I swear to god it actually said that.) founded a fitness company. PASS. Wait, dude can cook? Gotta circle back. (I mean, if you’ll feed me, aka a girl who can barely boil water, all can be forgotten.)

Garrett, 27

He is a pro golfer. And yawn. Also, an Alabama native. If he and Hannah get to talking, what are the odds ABC will subtitle them with their respective accents?

Grant, 30

OH, POOR BUDDY. His career is actually listed as unemployed. Yo, ABC, no fake or made-up title? Poor guy. I just can’t let it go. But, dude “has a hard time believing that any young guy who comes on The Bachelorette is ‘here for the right reasons,’ and he plans to call them out on it.” And so, I guess he’ll be shit-stirring the pot a bit?

Hunter, 24

Stand back Mr. Pro Golfer, we got a Pro Surfer ready to catch a wave into Hannah’s heart… (ABC, did I get your bio formula right?? Would you hire me? LOLOLOL). And he still lives at home with the ‘rents, so is he ready for marriage?

Jed, 25

This definitely-country boy is a singer-songwriter. Aw, our first one this season! I’m getting– what’s the country one’s name from seasons past– vibes? (Oh, Joshua with the leg tat from Idaho from JoJo’s season and Joe from Kaitlyn’s season, right? It’s the country boy thing.) I swear, drinking game for every time he shows up in a leather jacket this season!

Joe, 30

His career is “The Box King,” and I’m sorry, what? Oh, his family has a cardboard box business, okay, I guess that makes sense then. His cockiness, not so much. I’m sorry Joe but Bach Nation has room for only one Joe from Chi-town in our hearts: and that’s Grocery Story Joe.

Joey, 33

The old man of this batch of men is ready to settle down, minivan and all. Hey, Joey, if you show up to the mansion night one in a minivan, we’ll all know you just copied Garrett (the winner from last season), just saying…

John Paul Jones, 24

Why put your full name, unless you consider this your brand, acting audition, or whatever BS you label it as? His bio is basically one long, running gag about his three-word name. K, can you talk about anything else? Interests? Passions? Job? Family? Anything? Anything?

Jonathan, 27

He’s a server in LA, so basically an aspiring actor, right?? Another life of the party, always-clubbing dude, and I’m over it. Bye.

Kevin, 27

This small town guy had me saying “damn” to his career: “He works as a behavioral health specialist for the army, helping vets deal with trauma.” Mazel tov. And then, he enjoys “pumping iron” and travels… to the gym a lot. Check, please.

Luke P., 24

He’s looking extra Colton-like, right? This “good Christian boy” (I swear this info is coming direct LOL) really wants a wife, especially after some mysterious “religious awakening” in college, because sure.

Luke S., 29

He wishes he could be Nick Viall. He’s a political fundraiser, lover of tequila, apparently “once hit on Emily Ratajkowski and made her blush” and continues to talk about it all the time, and made a very inappropriate upon meeting Hannah on AFTR for the first time. Thank u, next.

Matt Donald, 26

First off, shame on ABC. You write this line: “Matt’s brother and parents are deaf, and he grew up speaking sign language.” And immediately follow it up with “We love a man that can communicate what he’s thinking with his hands without ever saying a word, and we think Hannah will too.” Boo. Thumbs down for the network. Onto him, woah, coming on really strong by saying he “loves Hannah and he hasn’t even met her.” No thanks to him and the network’s lack of a PC bio.

Matteo, 25

The guy founded a VR tech start up, has lived all over the world, is a strong and silent type, once chugged milk for a talent show, and oh yea, is a “sperm donor who has helped create 114 children for all types of families.” Ya know, just casually throw that in there.

Matthew, 23

He’s a “Car Bid Spotter” and I have legit no clue what that means. Auctioneering. A “Bid Spotter,” what? He has lots of tattoos, has never been out of the country, and enjoys exercising, and hanging with friends or his little sister, who is an actual toddler. And that about sums him up.

Mike, 31

This very energetic vet has a lot of swag and energy for all types of active activities. See ya later.

Peter, 27

Another pilot of the group. Do you think the two have ever crossed paths, or in the sky? You know, before living in a Cali mansion together and dating the same beauty queen? Also, how is your granny’s name a fun fact about you? He apparently is a fan of line dancing, which would immediately rule out a potential date in my eyes.  (Hey, my friend once twisted her ankle learning a line dancing. It’s dangerous, I’ve seen it firsthand!)

Ryan, 25

He’s a “Roller Boy,” no explanation given, but hey, dude, can I get one? He’s a risk-taker and adventurous, but hates birds. Nice to meet ya there, hope you enjoy your car ride home after a short journey.

Scott, 28

A Windy City native with spiky, gelled-up hair. He calls himself a catch and that’s all I need to bolt. But, he admires Kris Jenner, so before I split, can you please hand in an 1,000-word essay to the class on why you look up to the momager and savvy business mogul?

Thomas, 27

He’s not just a pro basketballer, he’s an international pro basketball player. Should I be oohing here? FOR A YEAR. He played pro ball overseas for ONE year, and that’s the career the show goes with??

Tyler C., 25

A former football player, and TBH, Hannah should run away from a guy boasting how he was almost in the NFL. No one wants a Colton repeat. *shudders*

Tyler G., 28

He’s laidback and would rather read than go clubbing. I’m on board. *keeps reading* He’s a Crossfitter and relaxes on his own boat. I retract my previous statement, y’all.

All in all, what a bunch of duds in this group. I wasn’t the most outspoken Hannah for Bachelorette supporter, but I honestly feel sorry for her. Because these guys are bland, and basic, and frankly not “here for the right reasons.” What can I say, I call it like I see it.

As much as I thought Colton and Becca’s respective seasons would be my last as a dutiful member of Bachelor Nation, honestly, the first look at the season has reeled me back in, and I’m here for the drama that’s coming, not for the journey or any potential to find an S.O. for a suitable amount of time before your Instagram blue checkmark arrives. So, I guess, I’ll see y’all on Monday nights.

Breaking Down the Women Competing for Roses on This Year’s “The Bachelor”

By now, we’ve probably forgotten all about the most boring season of The Bachelorette in franchise history (sorry, Becca). And after a difficult time dumping our fave (and Raven’s BFF) Tia in Paradise, it was revealed that COLTON (the former footballer turned kids’ charity founder slash virgin) will be the next lead. Not Jason, Not Blake, Not Ben Higgins, Not Wills, but Colton. I swear, I’m not bitter or anything… Whatever, I’m fine, I’m fine…

Now, that we are less than one month away from the January premiere, ABC has dropped the names, headshot, and bios about the 30 women vying for Colton’s heart, or just to take his V-card. Honestly, it’s probably 50-50. Or, more likely, to become Insta B-listers with a little blue checkmark to solidify their Fab Fit Fun and gummy hair vitamin endorsement deals.

So, now let’s go through my first impressions and judgements of these women who’ve voluntarily chosen to appear on this reality show. Let’s get started, and to be frank, I had plenty to say and judge when first reading through these, that and I was bored. Yawn.

Alex B.

  • She’s 29, so decent age, of someone ready to get married.
  • She’s a dog rescuer, like for real, so that’s cool. And something she and Colton can bond over,
  • Mouth.

 

 

Alex D.

  • She’s 23, which speaking as a 23-year-old, is she truly ready for marriage?? Because like I’m personally a long ways off. Maybe I just don’t get it. Whatever.
  • Her career is listed as a “sloth” for some reason… So, that is her intro to Colton I’m guessing?
  • Very into New England region. Apparently that’s all there is to her.

 

Angelique

  • Age 28, works in marketing sales, from New Jersey = average.
  • Seems friendly enough.

 

 

 

Annie

  • Another 23-year-old! See thought above.
  • Country girl raised on a farm. Now in finance in the Big Apple.
  • Was she the girl that left Colton and ranted about him on Snapchat?? So, spoilers, don’t put her in her Bach bracket at the end..

 

 

Bri

  • The 24-year-old model from Cali, is more than just a pretty face. Oh, I’m sorry, Barbie, is it?
  • Her biggest dating fear is farting too loudly. Um, ok?? (BTW, I’m crying laughing reading this.) And as one recap already pointed out, is a silent-yet-deadly one ok then?? Real questions.

 

 

Caelynn

  • Another 23-year-old! See thought above.
  • This young lady won Miss North Carolina 2018, and has a past with another contestant, Miss Alabama. Drama? Obviously, because they battled for the same crown. And here they are battling for the same prize Colton once more.
  • She’s not just a beauty queen… she flew to Japan once for a first date… Oh, has she been on The Bachelor before? (I know, I know, I’m not the first, and certainly not the last to make that joke, but if the shoe fits.)

Caitlin

  • The Toronto-based 25-year-old realtor seems likable and normal.
  • Chris Harrison compared her to fan-fave Kaitlyn Bristowe, so those are some big shoes to fill, Caitlin.

 

 

 

Cassie

  • Another 23-year-old! See thought above.
  • She’s a speech pathologist, but her bio still says completing her degree. Um, consistency?
  • However, she wants to work with kids using her degree, so mazel tov, and I hope that can happen for you. Truly.

 

 

Catherine

  • First off, there is no way she’s 26. She’s gotta be older.
  • Strong Krystal vibes. Including that Chris Harrison called her a villain. Hmmm.
  • She’s “DJ Agro” in Ft. Lauderdale, um def, villain vibes.
  • Next.

 

 

Courtney

  • Another 23-year-old! OK, so considering Colton is 26, 23 isn’t too young, it’s just to me personally, it seems very young, considering you barely know who you are at that age and what you want to do.
  • She’s a caterer hoping “she has the recipe for love” with Colton, man, the ABC producers get cheesier and cheesier.

 

 

Demi

  • Another 23-year-old! See thought above.
  • Texas country girl.
  • Her bio says “keep an eye on this one??” Is that a spoiler or just that she has big eyes??? Real questions.
  • I feel like she’s going to go far.

 

 

Devin

  • Another 23-year-old! However, she has a Masters degree, mazel.
  • She likes yoga, and eh, it’s fine.

 

 

 

 

Elyse

  • At 31, she’s definitely the eldest.
  • Originally from Alaska (is that a first from the show?), she now resides in Scottsdale— does she know Arie?? I have a feeling that A-word will be brought up this season.

 

 

Erika

  • She’s “The Nut.” Enough said.
  • Also, her talent is “being able to eat whatever she wants without gaining weight.” F U. Also, you won’t be winning over America with that line.

 

 

 

Erin

  • Her career is listed as “Cinderella,” which her bio completely backs up. Um, so entrance?
  • Also, she loves PSL. HAHAHAHA, I’m cackling by now.

 

 

 

Hannah B.

  • Another 23-year-old!
  • The 2018 Miss Alabama, who has a past with Miss North Carolina Caelynn, apparently bleeds Alabama. How many Roll Tide references will we get this season?

 

 

Hannah G.

  • Another 23-year-old!
  • Also from Alabama, the “content creator,” which is her real career listed, “plans photo shoots for her next posts.” So, she’s so ready for the Instagram endorsements to roll in.
  • Is content creator code for unemployed? But like in a nice way?
  • She likes glamping, so puhlease producers put her on a down-and-dirty date. Like Corinne with the cow dung shoveling date. I’m cackling just thinking about what could be.

Heather

  • She’s 22, so similar to my thoughts on the 23-year-olds.
  • Her career is “never been kissed,” which feels mean to call out. I mean, Colton’s career wasn’t virgin last year! That’s an unfair double standard.
  • Giving me strong Kendall vibes from last year.

 

 

Adrianne “Jane”

  • Her name is Adrianne, but she goes by Jane. And she’s categorized alphabetically with the J’s. How does one go from Adrianne to Jane? Is it like Jane Doe? Is she in Witness Protection? I have so many questions.
  • She’s a social worker, so mazel tov on helping others.
  • She seems nice and friendly, it’s just the name thing.

 

 

Katie

  • Meh, nothing interesting to report or joke about.

 

 

 

 

Kirpa

  • She looks like Shushanna from years past on the show.
  • Eh, I have a feeling she won’t stay past day one or two.

 

 

 

Laura

  • She wants moved to Spain “on a whim.” Why? and Why did she move back? Producers dig deeper with these bios.
  • But, YAWN.

 

 

 

Nicole

  • She looks familiar. No idea who she resembles though.
  • She hails from Havana. Ooh Na Na.
  • She seems like a younger, female version of Rachel’s love Bryan.

 

 

 

Nina

  • Geez, that’s a sad back story.
  • She’s watched The Bachelor with her mom and grandma for years, so her career could be “Superfan,” right???

 

 

 

Onyeka

  • Mmm, k. This is Onyeka. Of which I don’t know how to pronounce your name.

 

 

 

 

Revian

  • Her name reminds me of Evian and Revlon.
  • Her career is listed as nurse but in her bio, it says she’s an esthetician, which are two very different jobs. Does she not know what she does??

 

 

 

Sydney

  • She seems very normal, which is a low bar for the show, which means I like her already.
  • It seems to be the “never” season: she’s never had a boyfriend, Kendall 2.0 has never been kissed, and Colton is a virgin. Hmmm, purposeful?
  • I’d put her far in my Bach bracket, for this season, for Paradise, for Bachelorette running.

 

 

Tahzjuan

  • Not going to attempt to pronounce her name. I just hope Chris Harrison or Colton do not butcher it.
  • She has a tattoo that says “I love bad ideas,” so that explains why she’s on this reality dating show. Oh, how I love to tease.

 

 

Tayshia

  • She’s a phlebotomist and likes to volunteer. Seems nice and normal. No word on how long she’ll last, unfortunately, because I like her: she has purpose and drive.
  • We’ve come a long way from our beauty queens and content creators. Literally, we are in the Ts. But does Colton want a self-sufficient, successful girl or one who will settle for the career title of wife?

 

 

Tracy

  • I feel like she’ll be involved in drama this season.

 

 

 

 

It feels like a sea of girls who all look the same. Give Colton the strength to remember which one is which, because I’m already lost.

This season seems very boring. But, will I still be watching, obviously. Will I, like Colton, feel the desire to fling myself over a fence to escape this? Likely.

Breaking Down the Guys Competing for Roses on This Year’s “The Bachelorette”

By now, everyone knows how the end of “The Bachelor” went down: when Arie acted like a complete dirtbag and proposed to Minnesota-based publicist Becca K (albeit not very lovingly at all) and then promptly set up an on-camera break up and refused to leave while she cried, mere weeks later. It was brutal and we, as loyal members of #BachelorNation, flipped on the former racecar driver so fast for the horrible way he treated Becca and her emotions. *eye roll* Well, we moved on and thank goodness ABC decided to “do the damn thing,” aka making Becca the next franchise lead.

Stemming from the “Independent Woman” promo starring Becca holding roses (naturally, obvi), we were so ready to DO THE DAMN THING and watch Becca find a worthy guy. (I mean, I was already sold on four of the suitors she met at the After The Final Rose taping.)

And now, mere weeks away from the premiere of what’s being described as a “kick ass” season, ABC has released the headshots, bios, and the mostly ridiculous careers of Becca’s suitors. What follows next but my natural first impressions and judgements of these guys?? So, let’s do this.

First step, let’s relive my thoughts from ATFR, taken directly from my Twitter page, where she met five of the guys:

I like Lincoln: so sweet.

Ok. First Impression Rose. Done, Lincoln wins.

One look at Chase. Nope. Bad vibes.

Ok this banjo guy [Ryan] is so cute and sweet. My top pick.

Darius is apologizing on behalf of his gender. HAHAHAHAHAHA

Ok. And Blake. Top three with Ryan and Lincoln. Ok, Becca, yea, I think this journey is going to be good.

So already, I was primed to like Lincoln, Ryan and Blake as my top picks. Let’s what the rest of these bios reveal. One: Becca definitely has a type from first glances alone and there’s a lot of hair gel, a lot. Two, the bios, which is a few sentences instead of the usual questionnaire, WHAT. Okay, let’s get over my initial shock that producers actually changed something from the show’s format and dive right into my first impressions.

Age 31, nice normal age of a contestant usually here for the right reasons. Apparently he likes country music, playing with his dog, going to the beach with his boat, and skiing. That’s like the male equivalent of being #basic.

He “considers himself a modern romantic who believes that two people need to be independent in order to truly love each other, so he’s looking for his equal match.” Fair point, I like it. If he can swing dance, I’d like to say, we need proof. How cute would a swing dance date be with Blake and Becca? Not to mention reality TV gold for a show trying to evoke a romantic feeling. Ohhhh yea, he showed up on the horse, I liked him even then!

Nope. This is the smarmy guy we met on ATFR. Didn’t need to open his mouth, didn’t like him. Those feelings still apply for the Florida-based Advertising VP who is big into sports, the outdoors, and adventure. So Becca, please heed my warning (because I’m usually pretty good at spotting the players this show casts), and let him go already.

Seems nice and normal, perhaps a bit too into fitness. So, I’m guessing he’ll be shirtless often at the Mansion? Also, his goal is to follow in his family’s footsteps and retire by 40… So, um, you work until age 40 and then that’s it? You’re done? I just don’t get it…

Does Becca like an athlete? Because a lot of her guys, Christian included, like to boast about their athletic pasts and accomplishments. So, his biggest fear is “spilling something on himself” in front of Becca. DUDE, that would be me 24/7. I’m just saying, if a guy can’t handle me at my clumsiest self, than he doesn’t deserve me at my classiest, most put together self. (Did I do that popular Twitter meme correctly??)

Question, how does he pronounce his name? I’ll be waiting for his limo entrance for an answer. He’s a former Harlem Globetrotter, so I’m guessing he’ll be on a basketball or sports date at some point during his tenure on the show? OMG, he hopes finding love with Becca will be a “lay-up.” I’m rolling my eyes at that super cheesy line.

I WAS RIGHT, sports professional (and football player)! BAM. Sorry, I just like to be right. True gentleman, ok that’s nice.

IS HE A COUNTRY SINGER? TELL ME HE’S A COUNTRY SINGER/SONGWRITER. He’s got that look down pat. Oh, former footballer, and I apologize because now he dedicates his time to charity work and helping kids with CF and spending time with his family and dog. I’m so sorry, Colton. Wow, congrats on that amazing charity work you do. Mazel tov. But, question: so he famously used to date gymnast/Olympian Aly Raisman, whom he asked out via some sports interview thing, so is he here for the right reasons or more fame?? I’m skeptical.

Ooo, fitness coach: strike one. And fitness is his only thing mentioned in his two-sentence bio basically. So, bye.

Darius, who began his journey by apologizing to Becca on behalf of his gender and had the audience in stitches for it, seems like a stand-up guy. He likes to travel, dance and is energetic and fun-loving. The Milwaukee native (So, Midwestern values. Like Becca. And myself, just saying.) has perhaps one of the best lines written: “His most important mission is to live a life of service by giving back to others.” Bam, mic drop. Good guy.

Looks super young. And is another very basic Bachelorette contestant. I don’t think there’s anything else to say. But pretty and young. And hates avocado; so no brunch dates, I guess?

Apparently this fourth-generation electrician has a great sense of humor. I’m afraid I’ll need proof before you may continue on the show.

Sales rep and outdoors guy, that’s about it.

Well, neither he or Becca would have to move if they ended up together. And that’s not exactly a selling point: case in point, Andi Dorfman and Josh. Or Rachel Lindsey and Fred. And we all know how those instances turned out.

Lots of hair gel. A “successful banker with a heart of gold,” oh dear god, that’s cheesy. But he sings Disney songs, so he’s alright in my book because that’s my life and really all I listen to.

And welcome to the weird jobs club, Mr. COLOGNOISSEUR! Which just means he has a lot of cologne. Not his job, just a hobby for the Haitian-born Miami resident. Hey, Jean Blanc, are you going to gift Becca some cologne for your first meeting?? Also, the self-proclaimed bookworm is currently reading Amy Kaufman’s “Bachelor Nation,” book that I also read. LOLOL is this real? Like did he really think, ‘huh, you know what I want to read before I start this *cough cough* journey? The nonfiction book about the behind-the-scenes of this very show? You know the one that production kept trying to dismiss??’

Aww I feel bad, he’s “successful in produce, but unsuccessful in love” and “ripe and ready to be picked” by Becca. Awwww, poor guy. Produce puns, ughhh. But that first part? I feel so bad for him. Aww, sympathy rose from me.

I have a strong feeling this Silicon Valley tech guy won’t make past night one. Just a feeling. But “world-famous” banana bread? I’m afraid, I’ll need some proof John, if you’re going to use that statement. And by that I mean, bake me banana bread to judge.

Wait, is that Robby Hayes?? He looks very slick, anddd there we go, he’s a male model. Red flag alert. Also, he can run a mile in 4.24. For comparison, I would be huffing and puffing, exhausted by the start line while he concludes. So, that could never work out. Just saying.

May I ask what a “social media participant” means? Like a social media user? Yea, that’s like everyone. It’s free, you can say what you want, yea… Or is he prepping of his post-show career as an influencer? He also “dabbles” in male modeling who won’t get his hands dirty because he’s afraid of spiders. K, I’m laughing. Poor guy, doesn’t stand a chance.

That is 100 percent my brother’s hair and now I cannot unsee it. I’m sorry Leo, but I’ll be biased against you all season. I’m sorry, that’s my brother’s hair and I just can’t see past that. I’m sorry. Ok then, moving on, he’s a stuntman, yea that seems about right. That hair took ten years??? LOLOL, that took my brother like a few months. HAHA.

First, THAT ACCENT. As someone who’s lived in London for a bit, I love a British accent, so, sorry guys: Lincoln is already a step ahead. Aww cute, he “would love to have a big family to make his mom proud.” So cute. And he has such a nice smile.

CIRCLING BACK: I retract everything about what I thought about Lincoln. Disappointed in his actions (that would not make his mum proud) and with ABC for casting this man.

Hard pass on the hair, first off. It’s like wannabe Leo (or my brother haha) hair but not quite as good looking. Second, he loves festivals, horse races, and state fairs. Wow. Ok, bye now.

Life of the party? Fun-loving attorney? And a “weekend warrior” enjoys “brunches, barbecues, and the beach?” And alliterations, duh. Yea, I’m saying, PASS.

Rickey with the cute lil bow tie is what else for a Bachelorette contestant? Personal trainer. Course.

IT’S RYAN. Banjo guy!! *swoon* Aka Wells 2.0. And I’m okay with that. The 26-year-old “banjoist” (apparently that’s a thing) is very close with his family (who all plays in a bluegrass band with him, awww cute), plays the ukulele, guitar, and trombone, and is passionate about sailing, and wait for it: “can’t wait to make the Bachelorette his first mate.” Done, Ryan wins. Number one pick, hands down. I choose Ryan, everyone else can go home now.

And another model. Greaaaaaaat. Cool. Yup. Say no more, I’m out.

The California native seems nice and normal, and also really loves Harry Potter. Hope Becca (and her Sister Act 2 fandom) can mesh with Wills and his love of HP.

So get ready for May 28, break out your Bach Brackets and get your Fantasy Leagues ready to do the damn thing. And by that, I mean watch yet another dramatic journey where hopefully the lead falls in love and has about a 40% percent of staying together.

Until next time,

March/April 2018 Reading List

After quickly completing my January and February reading lists, once again I was on the hunt for some new reads. And so, what naturally follows? Heading to Barnes & Noble to browse through every single fiction aisle and shelf and see what strikes my fancy, naturally. And boy, did I find enough. Armed with a heavy bag of new books, I left the store ready to begin these new reading adventures.

“Bachelor Nation: Inside the World of America’s Favorite Guilty Pleasure” by Amy Kaufman

This nonfiction debut book from L.A. Times writer and self-proclaimed “Bachelor” fan, Amy Kaufman. Kaufman researched and interviewed experts to find out what really goes down in the Bachelor mansion while filming the hit reality franchise, and exploring why we all turn in week to week to watch it all unfold.

As an avid watcher of the franchise (lol could you tell from this blog??) and its fictional counterpart “UnREAL,” I was definitely as intrigued as I read the revelations from Kaufman’s original New York Post excerpt. I was curious, and so: reading list, here we go!

It wasn’t until Lifetime debuted “UnREAL,” that I even truly comprehended that something like “The Bachelor” or other reality shows were so produced. (I always knew they were scripted ala “Kardashians” but the dirty deeds of production? I was completely in the dark like most members of Bachelor Nation.) This book truly opened my eyes to how one of my ultimate guilty pleasures, so from now on (like Becca K’s ex showing up on this recent season? Come on.), in the name of media literacy, I can now comprehend what is actually going on and take the show as it is (a pleasure-filled dramatic television series) with a grain of salt. An interesting look at the psychology of a popular television franchise, how it gets made, and why we continue to enjoy watching such a trainwreck of drama.

“The Recipe Box” by Viola Shipman

The recently released novel explores the life of Sam, a busy sous chef for a hot New York bakery. Her life isn’t going as she planned, so she returns home to her small Michigan town to take inventory of her family’s orchard and pie shop. There, she discovers secrets and memories of her family, one recipe at a time in the heirloom recipe box. The inside cover continues, “As Sam discovers what matters most in her life, she opens her heart to a man she left behind but who now might be the key to her happiness.”

It seems intriguing, with a hint of cheesy romance often found in corny Hallmark romance movies. I’m in.

 

 

“Young Jane Young” by Gabrielle Zevin

The new novel by “The Storied Life of AJ Fikry” author illustrates the world of protagonist Aviva, a former congressional intern who was once the center of a political scandal that now may threaten her own bid for political office years later. The inside summary reads that this novel is a “smart, funny, serious, and moving novel about the myriad of ways in which roles are still circumscribed for women, whether they are young, ambitious interns; mothers attempting to steer their daughters through a male-dominated world; political wives facing an age-old knowledge that fidelity isn’t always honored; or young girls feeling bold about their many choices before they release the gender restrictions all around them.”

Seems interesting, especially as it tackles important issues that women still face everyday. Andddd… to page one we go.

“Hot Mess” by Emily Belden

In this installment of Miranda Reads Cheesy Millennial-Type Novels, Emily Belden’s “Hot Mess” seemed to intrigue me in such a way. The story centers around Allie, a twentysomething who is so infatuated by her love for sought-after, culinary genius Benji, despite storied past struggling with addiction and living an often-reckless lifestyle. When he is offered the job of a lifetime in creating a hot New York restaurant, Allie follows her love and takes a giant leap: investing her life savings in the establishment. What happens when Benji takes off on a relapse, leaving Allie alone with “nothing but a massive withdrawal slip” and an approaching opening day. She is suddenly thrust into the “world of luxury and greed, cutthroat business and sensory delight. Lost in the mess of it all, she can either crumble completely or fight like hell for the life she wants and the love she deserves.”

Seems promising and interesting to say the least, in a typical Millennial-centric novel, but let’s give it a shot.

“Needles and Pearls” by Gil McNeil

I was fascinated by Gil McNeil’s “Needles and Pearls” novel, which focuses on widow Jo, a year after her husband’s death, where she is finally getting used to being a single parent to her sons and her yarn shop is doing quite well to boot. But then, a man from her past arrives as well as a new romance with a local carpenter develops to “make life a whole lot more interesting.” The book tackles if Jo can “cope when things get complicated.”

Hm, tell me more… Guess I better read to find out?

 

 

 

Keep on reading! 💖

Judging This Year’s “Bachelor” Contestants, Part III

Guess what’s back, back again?? That’s right: my (now annual) Bachelor cast commentaries, because it’s my favorite part of the whole series. Have at my sarcasm and snark in all its glory…

First things first, ABC is promoting the hit reality show’s return as “Janu-Arie.” *cue the groans* I mean, are we really surprised? No. Who remembers how Ben H was a “perfect Ben” like a “perfect 10?” *eye roll here*

The Bachelor:

Arie Luyendyk Jr, some six years after his first appearance on the franchise (Emily Maynard’s season of the Bachelorette, 2012), returns to find love after having his heart broken on national television.

When ABC first announced their casting choice, while many had no clue who this older guy was (likely because they didn’t watch early seasons or that he’s not social media active, typically a staple of contestants these days). But, I did. I remember LOVING Emily’s season (and making my mom send me weekly recaps while I was at camp. True story.), and Arie’s buddy slash former Bachelor Sean Lowe.

Back in the day, I didn’t know how to feel about the “kissing bandit” Arie. I did like him and he seemed genuine, however, I was unsure if Emily could look past his occupation as a racer driver given her late fiance’s profession. Evidently, she did, until she couldn’t and chose Jef (with one F) instead, which we all know didn’t last long.

I do applaud ABC’s choice of Arie: getting back to the show’s roots that made it successful,getting away from these new faux-celebrities that the contenders all strive to be after the show ends (ugh.), and not choosing a Bachelor that wouldn’t give them the happy ending they crave for the show (cough cough, Peter.) Ok, rant over.

The Women:

The 27-year-old Oklahoma-based personal stylist seems normal, down-to-earth and sweet.

Ok first, the name “Amber” is like a red flag name for the mean popular blonde cheerleader girl everyone hated in high school (or high school centric movies).

Aside from that, the 29-year-old business owner (which idk if it’s real or “real” like Corinne who worked for Daddy’s business) seems basic. But her answer to “which fictional character would you be:” she said, “Ariel because she’s a beautiful mermaid that can sing and gets to marry Prince Eric, what a stud.” So, so she cares about looks and a handsome guy? Ughhhh. To compare, Ali (from above) said she’d be the empowering Wonder Woman. Ok, so I’m over Amber.

She’s 32! We got an age-appropriate one for Arie! That’s like a Bachelor unicorn! Anyway, the event planner seems normal.

The 25-year-old real estate agent also gives normal answers. Case in point: Her least favorite household chore: “LAUNDRY! Takes me a whole week from washing to folding and putting it all away.” I mean, relatable. *she types, staring at the laundry basket full of clean clothes sitting at the foot of her bed for at least a week.*

Becca K has some big eyes. Wowza. Ok moving on, the 27-year-old publicist really likes Sister Act 2. Not the first one, the sequel. As in she mentioned it twice. How the heck does Sister Act 2 come up twice naturally in conversation??? Legit curious.

Bekah M- NO AGE LISTED ON HER BIO- is a nanny. Ok, circling back: why didn’t she list her age? Like what? How did no one ask her? Or why didn’t she volunteer it when you volunteered to go on a nationally televised dating show? Apparently it’s a storyline for the show? Well, she did say she likes to be the center of attention. Well, huh. She does look SUPER young. Like if you are that young, are you really ready to marry a 36-year-old man?

First off, what type of name is Bibiana? One she says she enjoys popping her pimples. *throwing up in my mouth a little* And she gave this answer to the following question, Would you consider yourself a lover of art? “Yes, Wish I could be art.” WHAT THE HECK DOES THAT MEAN? You wish you could be art? That’s an answer to if you like art? Bibiana, can you please explain? I’m so confused. So, banking her as the crazy girl this season.

Bri looks like a model or pageant girl or something; think Courtney R the model-villain from Ben F’s season. Yuck. Ohhh, she’s a sports reporter AND won an Emmy. Ok, you shut me up. Keep doing your thing.

Meh, normal.

Brittany #2: normal. Also her answer to where she meets guys: “I don’t… jk. The past two I’ve met have been through dating apps and they’re terrible human beings.” Yea, that’s about right, lol.

She looks like a normal human! (I’m sorry, but The Bachelor has a low bar for people that are real humans with jobs, paychecks, health insurance, and real thoughts).

Why does she need to specify she’s a “real estate” executive assistant? Hint: the title is enough, we don’t really need the industry too.

COOL JOB ALERT: “I work for a psychiatry research lab. It’s important experience before getting a Ph.D. in chemical psychology. My career is very important to me.” Good for you, girl, good for you. *applause* And please for the love of all that is good in this world, please don’t quit your job post-show to hawk fit teas and hair vitamins on Instagram, please.

Beauty pageant girl? Wait, she looks like Emily Maynard!!! Ohhhh, how will Arie react to that? Hmmmm. Stay tuned.

Ok, how come legit every girl’s favorite movie is “Crazy Stupid Love????” I mean, I love a rom-com as much as the next girl, but come on, even I have to admit that one is far from an Oscar winner or a film classic.

Oh great, a bloody TV host. Like she’s really honestly here for the right reasons??

She’s the weird girl, remember that. Her best gift she’s received? ” My ex gave me an alligator hand holding an iron heart in a jar! I collect taxidermy so it was sweet to me.” What?!?! Um Arie, back away slowly…

She’s a fitness coach named Krystal? I’m gonna guess she’ll start some fights and cause some drama?

Oh no, what did we do to deserve another blonde Lauren B??? Noo, wasn’t it enough that Ben H picked the first blonde, boring Lauren B on his season? Now, we have to go through this all over again??

Normal, seems nice.

“Recent Masters Graduate,” soooo unemployed? I mean kudos on your degree, but let’s just call it what it is, shall we?

I repeat, there are FOUR Laurens! New record! There’s no way Arie can remember to keep these four straight; good luck Arie. This Lauren is super basic. Wow. Also in response to: How much do you enjoy the theater? She said, “Love it. If I got to see Hamilton, I’d die.” Because “Hamilton” is the only piece of theater out there. (Hey Lauren, need tips? Just check out this blog or my Instagram page and I’ll teach you all about theater.)

How is this pronounced? Is it like Raquel with an M or what? Also, she’s 23. How in the world are you ready to settle down and get married at 23. Like I’m around that age and that is utterly mind boggling, because there’s no way I’m ready to get married at this point in my life? Like really? Ok, rant over.

Meh, average.

30. Orthopedic nurse. Seems strong. Like this contestant.

Another 23-year-old! Is she really ready for marriage? Like seriously? Legit curious. Oh dear god, her favorite book. You guessed it folks, “50 Shades of Grey.” Dear god. This is for national TV, you couldn’t just say a classic or anything that resembles actual literature?

Seems normal, sweet-looking.

The Arkansas native is poised to be this season’s Raven. And I’m ok with that, since Raven was hilarious and so sweet.

Meh, no strong feelings here.

Well, ok I made it through the cast list. PHEW, that’s done! I’m sorry if that was a lot snarkier than in the past, these were my gut first reactions to their photos and bios. And hopefully these women prove me wrong come Janu-Arie (I know, I know. And I’m sorry about that.) 1st when the show returns.